The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Love Fades But Never Disappears …
February 9, 2015, 6:25 am
Filed under: Comment, Love, Rosie

So it’s the 2nd week since I decided to re-start blogging.

And I’m still here.

But it gets worse.

It’s Monday.

And I’m feeling sentimental.


A few weeks ago, I thought we had lost our beloved cat, Rosie.

She sometimes rushes out the door when I get home and when she hadn’t come out to see me after 10 minutes [she actually likes me, though it could also be because I give her treats], the reality that she may have got out started to become a reality.

But it got worse.

You see we live on the 5th floor of our apartment and there have been occasions where she has rushed out the moment I’ve got in and run into the lift before the doors have closed.

Every time this has happened I’ve been able to get her but maybe this was the time she succeeded.

I got in the lift and went to every floor of our building.


I went to the underground car park.


But it was when I went back to our apartment to check if she had been found that I really started to feel a sense of panic because I could see Jill was starting to get worried.

She had checked every one of her hiding places – even the vent that once fell down and she basically climbed into the walls of the building – but she wasn’t to be seen.

It was about now that I started to think she had gone.

She had run out of the door when I got home, got in the lift – which returns to the ground floor – and then, when the doors opened, panicked and ran straight from the apartment lobby, out of the automatic doors and into the madness of the China streets.

While she fancies herself as a tough cat, she’s pathetic and wouldn’t survive a minute on her own. She’s even scared of birds.

So I decided to check every floor again. Just in case.

But still there was nothing.

Then I went back to the underground carpark and looked under every car.

Again, nothing.

So all that left me to do was go out and walk the gardens shouting her name.

I grabbed a pack of her favourite treats and with a sense of despair, but a need to feel I was still doing something, I went out into the rain and shouted “Rosie” over and over again.

I walked and walked and walked but nothing.

Not even a meow from the street cats.

And it was now – after about 40 minutes of looking – that I started to come to the realisation that she had gone, that I would never ever see her again.

I loved that ball of fluffy mischief.

Yes she was a whining pain in the ass, but she was my whining pain in the ass and she had given me more happiness than I ever could have imagined.

The thought that she was on her own, out on the wild streets, was incredibly upsetting.

I imagined her hiding. Too frightened to move, too frightened to stay in one place for long enough to be found.

She would be cold and hungry and alone and all I wanted to do was find her, take care of her and protect her.

I started thinking how I could never have another cat.

That all it would do was remind me of who it was replacing.

And that wouldn’t be fair on the new cat.

I felt a real and deep sense of loss.

Why did Rosie have to run out?

Why hadn’t I noticed her escape when I walked in?

How could an evening go so bad so quickly?

Then the phone rang. It was Jill.

Rosie had just walked into the lounge from somewhere in the apartment.



The sense of relief was incredible. I mean totally out-of-proportion incredible.

Except it wasn’t really ‘out-of-proportion incredible’ because while she’s a cat, she’s a member of our family.

I used to snort in derision when people used to say that, but it’s true.

We know each others ‘ways’ and indulge each other – whether that’s letting her meow at 7am to announce she wants breakfast or me waking her up with pats when she’s curled up – which is why I live in the delusional belief that had she escaped into the wilderness on that cold, lonely night in Shanghai, years later we might have come face-to-face again and when it happened, the reaction would be something like this …

Happy Monday.

35 Comments so far
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If that’s how you are with your cat, your sons social life is officially doomed.

Comment by DH

Social life? He’s not even going to be allowed out to miss having one. Well, not until he’s a Forest fan who likes Birkenstocks. And listens to Queen. Of course.

[Not that you haven’t tried to screw this up with your present of a signed The Smiths album. Evil genius]

Comment by Rob

i hope you give it to him rather than put it in a dark fucking box hidden in the back of your perfectly fucking spaced out wardrobe. you fucking freak.

Comment by andy@cynic

Though the biggest news is you live on the 5th floor and don’t own the whole building. Disappointing.

Comment by DH

Give him time. ; )

Comment by Pete

Yes. But hopefully the commies come to their senses before letting that happen.

Comment by DH

I couldn’t afford it even if I wanted to. And I don’t want to. Not because it wouldn’t be great, but I’d be so ripped off it would be like handing my cash to someone promising to sell me Tower Bridge.

Comment by Rob

Rosie is a very cute. So glad she was fine but you should know by now that cats answer to no one.

Comment by Mary Bryant

yep, they do that. and yep, it’s a dreadful feeling. im so glad it wasnt worse.

Been there, both ways, and that sense of empty is so real, you start bargaining with a god you dont even believe in, to get them back…

Comment by judyt54

She’d eat you given half a chance, you do realise that?

Comment by John

I hope that option isn’t dead.

Comment by Billy Whizz

She’s trying already. I know – when she bites by feet – she’s not really playing. I can see it in her eyes.

Comment by Rob

I like your cat.

Comment by Billy Whizz

I’m glad you wrote how pets become part of the family. They do. People often scorn anyone that talks about their pet in human terms but I don’t know how you can’t when they are sharing your life 24/7. Glad all worked out in the end and Rosie gets to boss you around for another day.

Comment by Pete

I know. But it is still madness that people will give more money to animal charities than children. I’m not saying we shouldn’t care about the animals – of course we should – but people’s ability to value animals higher than kids amazes me.

Comment by Rob

insight. animals never fucking whine to see frozen for the 10,000th fucking time. they also never fucking demand increases in alimony.

Comment by andy@cynic

Cats are the ultimate strategists.

Comment by George

Oh yes. And politicians.

Comment by Rob

your cat is a fucking legend. hurt him rosie. hurt him hard. as much as he treats you like a fucking princess, he could do more. remember that and make him feel pain. preferably with your claws in his ball sack.

Comment by andy@cynic

I think Andy sums up the sentiment of the planet.

Comment by Bazza

In the words Wayne – from Wayne’s World – Nice. Not.

[Yes, I am on the cutting edge of current trends]

Comment by Rob

omg. JUST went through this last night with our dear 14 year old cat! they are assholes. he has been with me since before my husband. before my daughter. before 3 iterations of dogs. he’s my bestie, no doubt! and i felt like the worst mom, the worst friend for letting him just disappear. i SO get it.

i finally found him in a closed room at 4 in the morning, while composing the “missing cat” posters in my mind. snuggles and extra treats ensued. think i got a snuggle in return? no way. cats, man. he is pissed about our new puppy and didn’t give a fuck about what i just went through. would i do it again? no doubt.

here’s to the beautiful, adorable, wonderful little fuckers we love who pretend(?) not to give a fuck about us.

Comment by Kristin

Cats could defeat ISIS in about 3 hours. Why we don’t [gently] drop our four-legged fluffy friends on them rather than bombs is beyond me.

Comment by Rob

actually, they would kill me if they knew I was spreading this intel, but kitty drones are totally about to be a thing. look out evil-doers! 😉

Comment by Kristin

You’re worse that reddit.

Comment by Wayne Green

i realised overnight that this is essentially a post about how you melt down if you don’t receive attention for ten minutes.

Comment by John


Comment by Rob

Sounds just like you were at cynic.

Comment by DH

Hey Rob. Out of interest, are you a vegetarian?

Comment by antmelder

God no. I even managed to turn my 12 year vegetarian wife into a bacon sandwich loving eater within 3 weeks of dating. Dare I ask why?

Comment by Rob

So she was weak and light-headed when she met you.

Comment by John

how many times ex do i have to tell you. shes a scientist studying campbell as part of a study on dicks. it can be the only possible fucking explanation.

Comment by andy@cynic

Cats are ace it’s true. Ours is 13 years old name and too old to jump on us all the time, despite her name being Kato.
You can’t have lightsabre fights or build Lego stuff with cats.
You can’t teach them to swim or help them do their homework.
Or see them fall in love with the Smiths after such a wonderful present.

Comment by Northern

And does Rob appreciate the present? No. He thinks we were being cheeky bastards. As if we would be like that.

Comment by DH

hes a ungrateful selfish fucking dick.

Comment by andy@cynic

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