The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Why Husbands Are Better Planners Than Planners …
April 17, 2014, 6:10 am
Filed under: Comment

It only takes a look.

A twitch of the eye.

A minuscule curl of the lip.

A slight change in posture.

It speaks volumes.

In that instant, you know whether you’re in the good books or the bad.

But sometimes it’s not as simple as that.

Words are said.

Comments are made.

And yet you know that what’s being communicated is not actually what they want to communicate … and better yet, you know exactly what’s being said, even though it isn’t being verbalised.

It’s the ability to translate the unspoken words and mannerisms that allows you to be a good husband. Or at least a husband that doesn’t get a swift kick in the balls every night for doing something wrong that they didn’t even know they’d done because women have an ability to remember – and recall – at a whim, every fault you’ve ever made for the last 60 years.

Seriously, marriage is better for keeping your brain on it’s toes than Sudoku.

But I digress.

You see the thing I can’t work out is if husbands know the best way to understand their wife is to see and hear what is trying to be said – even though they’re not saying it – why do so many planners want their audience to literally ‘spoon feed’ them the insights they want to use in their communication.

I’ve met more than a few planners who have a total inability to read subtext … believing that only if someone conveys their feelings and opinions is it a valid feeling or opinion.

Who teaches them that way of thinking?

I can only assume their bosses were robots because few people do that.

Not – as Henry Ford suggested, because they don’t know – but because they either cannot articulate or convey their thoughts/feelings/opinions in a way that is clear and concise or they actually want to hide it for reasons best known to themselves.

So if you know a planner who thinks insights are something that are openly shared and spouted by the respondent, the best advice I can tell you to give them is to ‘get hitched’, because where marriage is concerned, survival isn’t – as Darwin suggested – of the fittest, it’s actually being able to read what isn’t being said.

23 Comments so far
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That is so true,a happily married woman does the same

Comment by orlandopaintingco

no they fucking dont. they just get by not listening to a fucking word of the wisdom the husband is saying. are you even married?

Comment by andy@cynic

Funny, the biggest insight I’ve heard from husbands is don’t get married.

Comment by DH

i love being married. thats why ive done it so many fucking times.

Comment by andy@cynic

How have we let orlandopaintingco make the first comment? We should all be ashamed of ourselves.

Comment by DH

stop fucking complaining. it means youve finally found some fucker who has less of a life than you.

Comment by andy@cynic

Jill will be over the moon to know you have turned her into planning practice. #romance

Comment by DH

I was just marvelling at the implied vastness of Jill’s memory.

Comment by John

It’s not hard to remember Rob’s entire life revolves around queen, birkenstocks and gadgets.

Comment by DH

But to remember every one of his faults

Comment by John

Hahaha … thanks Dave. And for your info John, all she has to do is say, “Remember that time you were stupid because of [Queen/Birkenstocks/Gadgets]” and my guilty conscience does the rest.

Comment by Rob

I’d like to suggest that if husbands did know the “best way” wouldn’t the divorce rate be a tad lower than it is? But really, anything anyone writes can only be a place marker until Andy provides his insights into wives and planners.

Comment by John

its the womens fault.

Comment by andy@cynic

you fucker campbell. i want to agree with the bollocks youre spouting but i know if i do that youve won. fuck you and your devious fucking ways.

Comment by andy@cynic

Very amusing Robert. What isn’t amusing is the news there are still planners debating what an insight actually is. How do these people do their job? The fact they seem to still be employed highlights how deep the issues in your industry go.

Comment by George

I know, it’s tragic isn’t it. A bit like all the ‘big data’ advocates who mistake knowing what people do for knowing why they do it.

Comment by Rob

I know it’s not cool to approve of what you say on here, but this point is phenomenal.

“Not – as Henry Ford suggested, because they don’t know – but because they either cannot articulate or convey their thoughts/feelings/opinions in a way that is clear and concise or they actually want to hide it for reasons best known to themselves.”

If there are any planners reading this post, the above quote should be your guiding light when seeking the truth.

Comment by Pete

Very kind, but it’s nothing new and of all people, you should know how long I’ve been saying this … I haven’t even evolved the way I say it. But thanks.

Comment by Rob

Your point about Henry Ford and the faster horse has always amused me. But don’t be too hard on him, he used insight to do a lot of good, especially for his employees and community.

Comment by Lee Hill

Excellent stuff. But most people don’t really remember what they do or really why they do it .
This is also true of husbands by the way who are manipulated into all sorts of my their more intelligent wives blissfully believing it was all their idea

Comment by Northern

From the Casanova of the North to Mr Under The Thumb. A decline that puts Nokia to shame … but at least the ladies of Leeds etc are now safe. Your wife is (as people say of Jill about me) a Saint.

Comment by Roberto

I take Casanova jibes from Mr questionable ‘I slept with Jenny Powells cousin’ Fonzie of the Midlands
My wife is a saint though it’s true

Comment by Northern

just fucking accept you both make mr bean look like george fucking clooney.

Comment by andy@cynic

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