The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Love Is In The Air …
February 14, 2014, 6:10 am
Filed under: Comment

I’m baaaaaaaaaaack.

Isn’t that the best Valentines Day gift ever?

Better than boxes of chocolates.


A romantic dinner.

A dirty weekend in Paris.

It is.

No, you don’t understand me, IT. IS.

Oh who am I fooling, even my wife has only spent one Valentine’s Day with me in the last 10 years – and it’s not this year because she’s in Sydney while I’m back in Shanghai – so I may as well accept it, go home and eat a Pot Noodle for one.

But before I do that, I need to write a bit more.

Not because I think you want it … not because I think you’ll read it … but after almost 2 weeks of silence, I have stuff to say and what I want to say is LOVE IS AWESOME.

It is.

I know that might sound soppy, but I don’t care, it is a great thing.

Not the Hollywood version that [1] never happens and [2] is full of people who marry, divorce and marry someone else all within a period of a week, I mean real love – the sort available to all of us.

Of course there are many types of love …

Romantic … family … friends … activities … moments … but at the heart of them all, it’s when you are sharing them with someone of significance that they get taken to a whole new level.

Sharing is often misunderstood.

It’s not about doing things 50:50. Sure, it would be in a perfect World – but for me, it’s simply the desire to share your time, mind and life to make the other person happy.

I’ve written before how I sort-of freaked out when I met Jill because this wonderful woman actively wanted to take my stresses and concerns away.

I had got so used to having to deal with that shit by myself, that I couldn’t understand why someone would openly want to help and I have to admit, I had a hard time trying to let go because I was worried it would all fall apart if I wasn’t there to closely hold it together.

But I did and it didn’t.

And the reason for that was she cared about my well-being and wanted to share the responsibility of that.

That’s amazing.

Of course, it only works if the feelings, actions and emotions are mutual … but when they are, that’s what love is and why it is the most wonderful thing in the world … something that can change your World both in the present and the future in ways you never even contemplated as possible.

And that is why I don’t like Valentine’s Day.

I actually think it is the opposite of what love is about.

Not just because for men, it’s a day that is ultimately driven by fear – the fear of not doing something so their wife or girlfriend gets upset – but because love is not in the big gestures, but in the small.

A life of flowers, chocolates, dinners and presents might sound wonderful, but I’d hate it.

I’d much rather have a life where I want to spend my time with the person I’m with and have them want to spend it with me.

A life where the conversations we have are open and broad.

A life where the adventures and experiences we have help form a bond that is deeper and more impenetrable by the day.

A life where ultimately, you care about their well-being and they care about yours.

A life of generously small acts.

That’s what love is. At least for me.

Which is a good job, because my wife has pissed off to Sydney and I’ll be spending it at home burning copies of Love Actually.

Whoever you’re with, take care of them and let them take care of you and may it be an unhappy Valentines day but a happy day for the rest of your life.

The End.


PS: From Monday, we will never refer to love – or this post – again.


PPS: I once wrote a post about Love Actually and how some scientists had said its multiple story lines could drive people’s brains to ‘breaking point’. I remember because basically every women in the office slagged me off for their favourite film. I wanted to link this post to that, but it’s gone. Literally disappeared. I went through EVERY post I wrote last year and it’s not there. I don’t know how it’s disappeared other than someone deleted it but I don’t know how that is possible, so if anyone casually comes across it – please let me know as it is literally freaking me out. Thanks.

34 Comments so far
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If this is the post you come back with after 2 weeks of rest, we’re doomed.

Comment by DH

I think that was assured with or without this post. Or blog.

Comment by Rob

That photo is one of the most disturbing images I’ve ever seen and it’s burned into my consciousness and I don’t know if I can ever get rid of it.

Comment by DH

It’s not a coincidence Jill is away every valentines day.

Comment by Billy Whizz

I’m shocked that she’s only away for valentines day b

Comment by DH

“generously small acts”

Comment by John

that could be describing baz or robs cock. theres a pairing in a sentence no fucker ever wants to think about again. especially poor fucking baz.

Comment by andy@cynic

Have you finished? You know I can read your comments/insults don’t you?

Comment by Rob

Welcome back Rob, it’s been quiet without your posts.

The photo might give me nightmares and you dance on the edge of schmaltz, but I like this post. I could not agree more with your perspective on valentines day and what love between two people really is about.

I don’t know what happened to the post that disappeared. I think I remember reading it so have you contacted wordpress?

Comment by Pete

good fucking idea pete. ill contact wordpress and ask them to lose all the fucking posts. it would make this blog more popular immediately.

Comment by andy@cynic

and i thought your post about fucking monster munch scraped the barrel. you reach more fucking depths than a fucking submarine.

Comment by andy@cynic

So what you’re saying is that I’m consistently pushing new boundaries? Excellent. Thank you.

Comment by Rob

Just so you know Robert, there are a lot of women who would like their significant other to express similar sentiments to them on valentines day. Pass my congratulations to Jill, she has trained you well.

Comment by Mary Bryant

Prepare to be disappointed.

Comment by DH

For someone I like, you do things that don’t make me like you very much Robert.

Comment by George

Thank you Mary, that’s wonderful.

I don’t know if it’s because I’m tired or if it was truly funny, but Dave – your comment was made me spit my coffee out from laughing. It’s all downhill from here.

Comment by Rob

bad luck george but you should fucking know by now campbell ruins lives without even fucking trying.

Comment by andy@cynic

I’m not gonna lie, half the fun of reading your posts are the comments.

Comment by btrner

I’m impressed you imply the other 50% is what I write. I’d never rate it that high.

Comment by Rob

I think I just have this sick disease where I earnestly enjoy hearing what other people have to say.

Comment by btrner

what a shame every fucker on here has absolutely fuck all to say of any significance or value. except me. i make einstein look like beavis and butthead.

Comment by andy@cynic

You’re on good form Andy. You must have missed me. Ha.

Comment by Rob

ive only missed you with my sniper rifle.

Comment by andy@cynic

Welcome back. When are you next away?

Comment by northern

Cheeky sod. Enough of that, more importantly, how is the little one? [For people reading this, I am not referring to Northern’s man-parts, despite this being Valentines Day]

Comment by Rob

He’s home, miserable and in terrible pain, but he’s home and he’s going to be OK.
The poor kid can’t sleep, every time he shuffles it wakes him up. So Juliette and I took in turns to stay with him last night. We’re both so tired we’re beginning to hallucinate.
if someone told me that I could take his pain onto myself, I would gladly have someone set about my elbow with a trip hammer.
On the other hand, he’s got a new box of dinosaurs and various Hot Wheels out of it, along with a flood of chocolate ice cream. So it’s not all bad..

Comment by northern

All OK?

Comment by DH

You shouldn’t say what your son got as a reward because Rob will smash his elbows in and ask us to contribute to a new gadget for medicinal purposes.

Comment by DH

Two broken elbows but he’s on the mend.

Comment by northern

I don’t want to know how he did that but I’m glad he’s getting better.

Comment by DH

what the fuck happened? did he throw a creative tantrum? hope the kid is ok. hammering your elbows would be good. it would make me feel a fuckload happier now campbell has returned to rape my mind with his blog shit.

Comment by andy@cynic

Disturbing pic, disturbing comments… it’s good to have you back.

Comment by John Doe

fucking fool.

Comment by andy@cynic

Glutton for the underwhelming.

Comment by DH

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