The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

You’re going to need to when you watch this …

The good news for Little Billy is that with the utter nonsense he’s spouting in this clip, he can be sure if the Black Eye Peas turn to shit or his creative director gig at INTEL goes tits-up, there’s a chair with his name on it waiting for him at Landor.

Probably with a job title proclaiming he’s the, ‘Global Proprietary Tool Design Innovator Creative Director’.

Or something.

Seriously, how the hell has he become the ‘go-to man’ for companies wanting to sex themselves up?

How???

OK, so the brands he works with tend to be companies that like lots of beige and grey – but he is in the Black Eyed Peas for christsake, they’re the beige and grey of music.

Ahhhhhhh, now I understand.

With all this celebratory c-suite hiring we’re seeing, what’s next?

Brian May made the head of style at Vidal Sassoon?

Stephen Hawking appointed chief engineer at Segway?

Alicia Keys made creative director of Blackberry?

Oh hang on, that one has happened.

Steve Jobs must be pissing himself in his grave right now.

Collaborating with companies on something you actually know about – or have credibility in – is one thing.

Pretending you’re an expert in something you have no idea about just because a company paid you an utter fortune in a desperate attempt to ‘get down with the kidz’ because typically, they’re about as welcome as Jimmy Saville at a pre-school sleepover is something totally different.

It makes you look a fool.

It makes the company look a fool.

We have enough fools in the World.

Enough already. Seriously, enough already.