The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Welcome Back, I Have Nothing To Say But That Won’t Stop Me From Saying Something …
October 8, 2012, 6:04 am
Filed under: Comment

Hello folks, how are you?

Yes, I had a wonderful holiday.

Lots of incredibly immature activities which is far better at making you feel young than any hair dye or moisture replenishing cream.

So as I was writing this post, I came across something Northern wrote.

In it, he basically – and correctly – said a lot of blogging is bollocks, wrapped up in self-importance, over-inflated ego.

He’s right.

When I started writing this, it was much more about having a place for me to scribble down my thoughts and ideas than anything else … hence I’ve written about my first digital clock radio, my best friends cock and some planning stuff without ever feeling it was weird.

To be honest, I have tried to maintain that attitude, except I’ve realised that there have been more than a couple of times when I’ve slipped into condescending wanker mode.

I seriously didn’t mean to and I swear the reason I wrote such things was because it was an issue swimming around my head at the time, but without doubt, to the bystander, I will have come across as a twat.

And given I love Queen and wear Birkenstocks, I don’t need any more reasons for people to loathe me.

So what am I saying?

Well, 3 things really:

1. I know What I’m Not Good At

While I wish I could write clever stuff like so many others out there – NP, Martin, George etc etc – I can’t.

That doesn’t mean I’m a totally thick bastard – but the fact is, this blog was never created to be anything other than a place where I could dump stuff that was rolling around my head at the time.

The sad thing about adland is that the actual amount of time you get given to ‘think’ about stuff is relatively small and while I would never suggest this blog is my compendium of thoughts – God forbid – there have been times where I’ve revisited something I’d written in the past that has helped me move ahead with something that had been bothering me.

Not often though, but I’m OK with that. Honestly.

2. This Blog Keeps Me Regular

I have an addictive personality.

I learnt this quite early on in my life through things like collecting key-rings [don’t ask], playing slot machines [a bit of an issue in my early teens], not drinking [contrary to popular belief, not an issue ever] and loving music.

So what’s that got to do with this blog?

Well basically, writing it has become another addiction of mine – except, it’s a bitter sweet addiction.

You see, while I enjoy having a place to write my ramblings, it can also be a pain.

Yes, as much as it violates your senses, it can drive me mad too.

So why do I keep doing it?

Because I know that if I stopped writing it for a period of time, I’d stop altogether.

That might sound wonderful to you, but it’s not something I want to do, at least for now.

I am someone who needs a certain element of routine to get the best out of me.

Left to my own devices, I would constantly go off on tangents that even a protractor couldn’t measure. While there are good things about that, not having any structure – at least for me – can be dangerous and so this blog, as mad as it may seem, gives me something to keep me on the straight and narrow.

Mad eh?

But there’s more than just routine and structure that keeps me writing my rubbish.

You see I genuinely find it interesting to see how over the years, my viewpoint has evolved and changed more than a Tory government MP. Not on everything, but on quite a few things and the best thing is that when it’s happened, it’s because of some debate that has occurred on here.

Which is nice and makes me happy.

But on top of all that, there’s one more reason why I keep this blog up.

You see a while back, Jill told me this blog was quite important to her.

Sure, it was for strange, twisted and downright mental reasons, but that alone is a big enough incentive for me to keep it up, even if the posts are 99% hot air, 1% slightly less hot air.

3. I’m The Most Un-consise Planner On Earth

I’m guessing you had already worked that bit out.


So there you have it.

A complete justification of why this blog is rubbish.

Which is why if you want to read things of value and learning, you’re best off visiting other blogs – of which I’ve listed some above – but if you do find yourself on here, I thank you for your patience, bad taste and sadist tendencies.

30 Comments so far
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So you’re back. Well that’s ruined next week for me already.

Comment by Billy Whizz

You might not have a problem with alcohol but this post has just got me reaching out for my trusty friend jack daniels to numb the pain.

If I end up in betty ford, you’re paying for it.

Comment by Billy Whizz

I wouldn’t put it past you.

Comment by John

Yeah, because you weren’t a drunkard before we met. If that’s what your defense will be in court, may I suggest you don’t waste your money. You’ll lose. Within 30 mins.

Comment by Rob

You collect key rings and tell us not to ask. Are you mad?

I knew you had an addictive personality, we all knew that, but this news is shocking even for someone who had to work with you for a few years.

Comment by DH

Let’s nip this in the bud shall we. I collected keyrings when I was about 8 years old.




So to clarify, I don’t collect them now thank you very much … but if memory serves me, some were very cool, from having torches & maps to toy cars & errrrm, bibles.

And to think you think I’m sad now … Ha!

Comment by Rob

I collected keyrings as a kid too! still have them in a box at my parents house back home. they’re all joined together too to make a massive heap of cheap metal. fuck what everyone else thinks, i love that thing.

Comment by Age

campbell + key ring = planning twat
age + key ring = planning twat

undeniable fucking proof that if you have a kid and they start collecting key rings, parents should kick the fuckers up the arse immediately or they could end up having a planner for a son/daughter.

thanks for the early fucking warning gents. ill be watching my pride and joy like a fucking hawk.

Comment by andy@cynic

By the way, you could have stopped this post at the title, we knew the rest without you having to force it down our throats.

Comment by DH

Welcome back. I suppose.

Comment by DH

stop fucking encouraging him.

Comment by andy@cynic

Welcome back Robert.

For what it is worth. there are many occasions where I find your rambling both informative and enchanting so please don’t change on my behalf.

Comment by Lee Hill

Nice backhanded compliment there Lee. I’m impressed.

Comment by DH

Jesus Lee, even you’re getting in a few jabs … so much for saying absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Comment by Rob

at fucking last. lee has stopped drinking the kool aid and seen campbell for the fucking parasite he is. what took you so fucking long?

and while im at it. where the fuck is baz? campbell has a fucking iphone 5 and if i find that little fuck gave him one for free, im going to put him in a matchbox and not let the fucker out till he is on deaths fucking door.

Comment by andy@cynic

You can rest easy Andy, he didn’t get it from me.

Comment by Bazza

The positive way to look at this blog is that unlike Northern or Martin’s you never know what you will find and that keeps things interesting. I mean, who needs a constant stream of intelligent, thought provoking viewpoints anyway?
Welcome back.

Comment by George

Am I that predictable?

Comment by northern

Only you could be insulted by a massive compliment.

Comment by Rob

So yes, it would appear I am

Comment by northern

great fucking insulting there auntie. as sly as a fashionista bitch at when she realises shes sitting next to the chief designer of primark at paris fashion week.

or some other bollocks.

Comment by andy@cynic

Judging by the lack of activity on here today, it’s nice to know that after just 5 days away, I’ve seemingly been forgotten.

Mind you, it could also be because the post is even crapper than normal. I live in hope.

Comment by Rob

Where’s Boucher then?

Comment by northern

I don’t know. Quiet without him isn’t it …

Comment by Rob

Lets hope his little angel is keeping him busy rather than him sulking

Comment by Northern

this blog is nothing without me. i was having a fucking long weekend break. unfortunately it was in fucking canada which made it feel like a long year break and not in a good way.

Comment by andy@cynic

what the fuck is this pile of shite campbell?

correction. what the fuck is this pile of uber shite.

its bad enough when you write your planner wank, but when you go in to your over written, over complicated, over fucking pretentious wank it makes me fucking ill. i know it cant be the holiday that turned you in to this because you have so fucking many that wed of seen it before which means it can only be the fucking z grade northern casanovas fucking fault.

fucking apologise groper. thanks to your fucking influence, you have robbed me of 3 minutes of my life ill never fucking ever get back. on the brightside, thats less than the 20 fucking years campbell nicked off me so stop your fucking whinging.

Comment by andy@cynic

you love every second of it
amd where the hell where you?

Comment by northern

This post title was too good to ignore when you tweeted it and so enjoyable to read that I’ve decided to free up the time to lurk here again and on blogs I enjoyed in the past in case I’ve anything useful to add.

Have you considered writing – ‘I’ve got something to say but I forgot what it was’ post?

Lots to talk about here. So much changed for me. Still is really.but not how I anticipated it.

Are you well? I caught an acupuncture tweet from you and prayed for your Chinese ancestors to take care of things.They should know this but need reminding from time to time.

Comment by Charles Edward Frith (@charlesfrith)

fuck me, this is like a visit from haleys fucking comet.

chaz is back. all we need is lauren swearalot to come out of her self imposed quarentine and this blog might be back to the slightly less shit than the current shit days.

good to know youre alive chaz. see you in another 70 years because when you see what youve been missing, you wont come back.

Comment by andy@cynic

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