The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Believe it or not, I’d never seen an episode of the show – in the UK, US or Australia – and while that alone is probably one of the best reasons to live in Asia, I was kind of interested to see what it was all about.

Well, as you all know – it was absolute pants – but what I found fascinating were the ‘guest artists’ the Australian producers decided were the best choices to represent what the show is all about.

In order.

1. Michael Bolton.
2. Ricki-Lee Coulter.
3. Susan Boyle.

WHAT. THE. FUCK!

An out-of-date singing embarrassment … a current day, only-known-in-Australia, singing embarrassment and a star who might owe more of her success to people’s guilt than singing talent.

Yep, that show is really going to give singers a platform of credibility to leap off.

Every one of them is carefully designed to give the brand a bit of breathing space from all the competitors that stand around them … even though in a lot of cases, they pretty much do exactly the same thing.

Even then, some are bloody awesome.

Regardless if all they’ve done, is make a clever play on words, they can be powerful, memorable and effective.

Of course it’s a bit mad that many positioning’s are influenced more by what the competitors say than what the brand could – or should – talk about, but hey, the industry is so obsessed with differentiation that they’re occasions where we will bite our nose to spite our face.

That said, every now and then there’s a brand that comes out that loudly, proudly and clearly expresses what they’re all about.

They don’t care if what they ‘offer’ is a condition of entry for the category.

They don’t care if the competition are saying similar things, albeit in a more flowery way.

They don’t care if the product they sell is in a low interest, low involvement category.

They come out and own the moment and drive attention … which is why if I was walking along a supermarket aisle, casually looking for a hand sanitiser, I’d choose this:

And it went OK.

I think.

Though apparently at one point in the presentation, I asked the 500 attendees whether any of them “liked porn featuring dwarfs having sex with polar bears” which for that alone, is going to ensure that I am never invited back. Or allowed in a zoo.

And no, I don’t understand why – or how – I asked that question either.

I also met the journalist behind my recent media misunderstanding and – sorry to disappoint you Andy – there was no punching or shouting, it was all very polite and he’s a decent guy who is kindly making amends for what happened, even after I started my speech by calling him and the article out. Hahaha.

Anyway, if anyone is in the slightest bit interested in seeing what the hell I talked about – as well as see how many slides I have managed to ‘recycle’ from previous presentations – here you go:

As usual, it was mainly pictures so all the narrative came from me – but I’m hopeful you can get most of what I am trying to say.

However, to help you along, the gist is this:

SLIDES 1-7: How I haven’t got the faintest idea what will be the next big thing in digital marketing and that after talking to a lot of people in the business, I don’t think anyone really knows what will be the next big thing in digital marketing.

SLIDES 8-9: Except my Mum.

SLIDE 10: A reminder that digital marketing is the same as any marketing – it’s purpose it to help clients attract more people to them than their competitors.

SLIDES 11-21: Some of the pros and cons of digital marketing.

SLIDES 22-24: What my Mum and me will be presenting in terms of ‘tips to make your digital marketing work harder for brands and people’

[It also includes what we won’t be covering either because we don’t know enough of it or because everyones heard enough of it]

SLIDES 25-30: It’s important to look at more than just people’s digital habits because otherwise you are missing out on an opportunity to develop something more powerful, emotional and motivating. The porn and gaming industry are pretty good at this – even if their category deals in the dark side of human traits – however the best example is possibly Harry Potter, because if the author had based writing her book on the characteristics of how people consume books, she’d of either not bothered or would have written something short, to the point and with far less complex characters and storylines.

SLIDES 31-35: We have become obsessed with ‘social’ but we should be focused on creating things that people want to make social because they’re interesting and meaningful to their lives, not just the brands.

SLIDES 36-39: Digital is a medium that allows incredible flexibility and allows messages to be made more meaningful by simply finding ways to integrate into people’s World’s rather than trying to make people do something different just because it suits your agenda. The examples are when Second Life was flooded to promote the effects of global warming, Def Leppard releasing a single via a video game prior to any more ‘traditional release’ platform and Bjork creating experiential music experiences that ultimately drive paid for music and enhanced experiences.

SLIDES 40-41: Similar to the point that you should look beyond people’s digital habits is the power of addressing cultural tension points – things that make people think and react, even if it’s done in a playful way, ala the Burger King Whopper Sacrifice.

SLIDES 42-43: Don’t forget that online is no longer a parallel universe it’s part of people’s natural habits and day so it’s vital you communicate your brand in a way that is true to the brand – not some weird love-child simply because you think that’s what you have to do when embracing digital communication. It’s also important to remember that digital is no longer the domain of just youth, and so a greater appreciation of who you are targeting is vital. The example I use is Uniqlo … possibly one of the greatest brands to use digital as marketing out there. Fresh, meaningful, interesting and true to the brand voice, whatever they do.

SLIDES 44-46: There are people out there that create technology because they are consumed by the desire to do something new. That is admirable, but in marketing terms, it’s vital you remember that unless it helps – or enables – people do something that is meaningful to them, it’s more of an indulgence than something effective. At the end of the day, you should always look to do something that has a powerful effect on a group of people and my examples are [1] INSTAGRAM – which basically photographers and models use to expand their portfolios [something they did off their own back, not through the aid of an agency] and [2] W+K ‘ChalkBot’ that basically allowed people to leave messages of hope and love and support in real time during Lance Armstrong’s return to the Tour De France after recovering from cancer. In short, while Instagram and ChalkBot are great pieces of tech, people used them for completely different – and personal – reasons.

SLIDES 47-50: Basically it’s time the digital, media and creative communities stopped bashing each other. We all need each other because digital is an incredible gift for the comms industry and we must nurture it, not weigh it down with petty squabbles and attempts at ‘land grabbing’. Of course there are many factors that drive this – client remuneration models for one – but the fact is a Mum who videoed one of her children biting her other child has had more ‘views’ than many of the Top 10 Digital Marketing campaigns COMBINED … so as good as we think we are, we can be better when we work together and the state of a lot of bad digital marketing is something that needs the blame shared, not just placed at the feet of one division.

SLIDE 51: Remember we’re not competing against other brands marketing themselves on digital … we’re up against films, video games, tech … so make sure it’s brilliant in every way because otherwise you’re ultimately working against the goals and roles of why clients hired you in the first place.

SLIDE 52: For some reason this slide doesn’t appear but it should be this …

This is not saying ‘thinking’ is more important than having brilliant creatives, coders, tech guys or anything else – nor is it trying to advocate keeping to a model where everything is left to the creative department and then once they’ve had their “genius” it’s passed down the line of skillset and talent – it’s just that if you want to create digital communication than is meaningful, powerful, motivating and memorable, you have to have a good understanding of people, purpose [from both an audience and a client objective perspective] and provocation because anything less and no one will get what they’re looking for.

Digital might allow brands to connect to people in ways like they’ve never done before.

And digital might let them creatively do things like they’ve never done before.

Which will allow society to express, connect and enable them like never before.

But as the last slide – and my Mum says – the basic principals of digital marketing are the same as marketing has always been and if you ignore them, the best you’ll do is make digital ‘marketing’ material when – with a bit more work – you could be creating something that has enviable levels of value, meaning and enablement for both people and brands.

Right, that’s it … I know no one will read any of this so I’m not going to waste more time writing up any more notes so instead I’m going to go out and hear the other speakers and work out just how bad I was in comparison.

And I’m excited about that.

Not just because I can make sure people don’t see me as some angry luddite, but because I think digital is amazing when it’s used brilliantly.

In typical fashion, if anyone read my response to the article that I feel didn’t quite grasp what I was trying to say to the journalist, you’ll pretty much know what I am going to be presenting, but if you’re a glutton for punishment – or just plain sick – and want to know how I am saying it, then I’ll post it on here later … once I know I’ve got away with it.

Right, that’s it … I’m off to go and do it as well as see whether I survive or die.