The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

They Don’t Make Advertising Like They Used To … Oh Hang On, Yes They Do!
October 31, 2008, 7:33 am
Filed under: Comment

When I was growing up, I was in love with a magazine called ‘Viz’.Viz was basically a politically incorrect ‘comic’ featuring a whole host of charming characters including SID THE SEXIST, SPECCY TWAT, JOHNNY FARTYPANTS and the FAT SLAGS to name but a few.

However, as much as the strips were hysterical [and the letters page was sheer bloody genius] the bit’s I loved were their fake ads.

I won’t go into detail about them as there’s simply too many to mention – however if you have the chance to do a quick search, you should check them out because they’re bloody brilliant.

Anyway, years later when we started cynic, I approached some of the VIZ guys because I basically wanted to have them as part-time copywriters – however whilst that didn’t work out, we got friendly with quite a few of them and they helped us write our original website copy as well as our creds.

The reason I’m bringing this all up is because I’ve just come across an ad that on first glance, could easily of come from Viz in its heyday, except it’s not a joke – it’s bloody serious.

Yep the classic ‘before and after‘ shot … however in typical VIZ style, they bare no resemblance to eachother whatsoever.

OK, so I guess that is the point … but come on, this is ridiculous.

The ad is actually for a stretch mark treatment and once I worked out it was for real, I genuinely thought they’d got the pictures the wrong way round – but regardless of that, it’s abit bloody unfair, let alone unrealistic, to compare a picture of a woman heavily pregnant with how she ended up looking after giving birth.

[Plus we don’t actually get told when that AFTER photo was taken – it might be years later!!!]

It’s the equivalent of showing a picture of Arnie when he was aged 3 and then when he was in his Mr Universe phase and claiming some bloody nutri-shake for the effect.

To add insult to injury, at the bottom of the ad in very small print, there was the statement that there was no scientific proof that none-operational techniques could get rid of stretch marks.

So not only are the bastards going for the biggest exaggerated BEFORE AND AFTER since VIz’s Camilla Parker Bowles ‘Horse To Queen’ pisstake, but then they have the audacity to basically admit that everything in the ad is potentially false.

Seriously, someone at The Sun or The Sport should sign them up – or maybe even Viz – because these guys are hysterical though they’ve obviously got money to burn if they’re happy to spend a big wad on just taking the piss.

What next? Slimfast claiming Kate Moss used to be Bernard Manning?

10 Comments so far
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ok campbell i admit it this is a fucking funny post. of course it has fuck all to do with you its all borrowed interest but that before/after photo is the best fucking thing ive seen since the “skegness is fucking shit come to margate”

Comment by andy@cynic

I know you’re going to confirm that’s a serious ad but I have to ask, is that a serious ad? It’s the most brilliant rubbish I think I may have ever seen and I agree it’s a Viz ad in disguise.

Comment by Pete

Yes it is genuine Pete … and it’s also recyclable because I can take the photos, put them in the opposite order and say PIC 1 is Andy pre-marriage and PIC 2 is post.

Yes I do know that means I’m saying he wears lady pants, ha!

Comment by Rob

yes, andy wears lady’s pants and defies the laws of nature by getting pregnant… freak. 🙂

Comment by lauren

this VIZ VIZ seems to be Mad Mag v.2.. i like it already.

Comment by lauren

In the heyday of Viz, they made ‘Mad mag’ look just 2 degrees off normal. Yes, it was that good … though I remember I once downloaded their internet games onto my computer desktop and then had to go to a client meeting where the icon for “LESBIAN TENNIS” projected onto their boardroom screen.

I wouldn’t of minded except the game was basically just Pong but with a photo of a 1970’s glamour woman for each paddle. That was not a high point in my career I can tell you … especially when I insisted I showed it so they didn’t think I was a complete perv. I’ve matured since then. Allegedly.

Comment by Rob

Is Billy moonlighting again?

Comment by Bazza

My favourite Viz ad that is very relevant now:

Need money?
Then fuck off.
Shatwest Bank

Comment by Rob Mortimer

Mine was by the supposed SAUSAGE Industry that said …

“Remember, eggs are the unborn fluffy babies of chickens – eat sausages”

… to which the response from the supposed Egg Foundation was …

“Remember sausages contain cow lips, eyes and arses”

Genius … and more motivating than half the stuff out today, ha!

Comment by Rob

another hard hitting advertising expose campbell. 60 minutes must be fucking beckoning or do i mean fucking playschool?

Comment by andy@cynic

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