The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Ferrari Are Brand Whores …
June 11, 2008, 7:15 am
Filed under: Comment

No it is not April the 1st, what you see in front of you is a ‘Ferrari Segway‘.

Sure, it has a better acceleration than a snail plus a top speed that puts Stephen Hawkins to shame – but it’s still totally shit.

I mean it’s bad enough when a Ford Mondeo driver has a Ferrari keyring, but anyone who buys this product would redefine the meaning of sad … especially if they have a Vauxhall Nova in his/her garage.

Don’t get me wrong, brand associations can be hugely powerful and profitable – but as I’ve written about in the past – they can also be a total disaster, even if one brand makes a heap of [short-term] cash from selling their image to some another organisation.

I would love to know how many they’ve actually sold – because at 7,000 Euros [excluding VAT] they represent about as much value-for-money as a Louis Vuitton tampon!

17 Comments so far
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i bet clive sinclair is kicking himself for not launching the ferrari c5. ginger twat

Comment by andy@cynic

Wait till you see the Ferrari iPod Robert 🙂

Comment by Bazza

Well it’s got to be better than the U2 ipod! 🙂

Comment by Rob

I’ll never understand this rubbish… as a Ferrari fan this makes me angry. And when I’m a baller, this crappy brand whoring will prevent me from becoming an owner, ahem!!

lol @ Louis Vuitton tampon though!

Comment by Age

By that comment Age, I assume the brand of car you drive is one that you feel embodies it’s own values and personality and has no ambition to sell it’s soul for millions and millions of dollars because it is being true to itself.

Or looked at another way … it’s a shitty car that no one would ever pay good money to be formally associated with.

Like a Holden 🙂

Comment by Rob

in Chicago, down by the lake, you see dozens of fat people on these (not Ferrari ones of course)who have managed to convince themselves that because they are moving and they are outdoors, that they are somehow exercising. now does a Ferrari version means they are ‘exercising’ in style? and that all the brand attributes are magically transfered? no, I reckon that this is just a conspicuous indicator of wealth that is needed because the usual clues (watch, car, suit) have been left at home. its saying I have money. BTW, my friend Matt back in the UK has an old ferrari, we drove from london to cornwall in it for new year once, I froze my bollocks off.

Comment by Mr McG

My favourite ‘Ferrari story’ is when a very beautiful friend of mine was being chatted up by a ‘City gent’ she had met at a party.

He suggested they go to Brighton at the weekend and then said, “We can take the 355”.

My friend – ignorant about cars – replied, “Is that the bus that takes you to Brighton?”

To which the cock then had to meekly explain he was referring to his Ferrari … which made him look about as big a wanker as you possibly can.

Comment by Rob

hahaha great story!

And for your information I drive my 1989 Holden Calais because I am a fan of CLASSIC Australian automobiles. No other car embodies more of the Australian way of life like the $30 every two days drinking petrol at $1.60 a litre, oversized boat steering, 450,000kms on the clock, carpet that smells like soggy water and power-steering pissing out of every hole like the great 1989 Holden Calais.

Truly a car enthusiasts car. Ya’ll just won’t get it… hmph!

Comment by Age

Sure you do Age … sure you do 😉

Comment by Rob

all i think of when i see these things is weird al’s white’n’nerdy – so far from ferrari’s italian stallion schtick, it’s ridiculous.

Comment by lauren

But isn’t this a brilliant way to spot shit products?
Just imagine the MD of a company producing a cheap, horrible eau-de-cologne. One of those you only smell at brothels. He walks straight to the CEO of the company.

“Hello Johnny. You know we got this new shitty new product here. And you know what? Call me genius but I found a way to sell millions of that shit. One word. F-E-R-R-A-R-I. They license everything from pencils to shavers to memory sticks. Just imagine our ne shitty Ferrari aftershave. That way we get all those underclass and middleclass dickos to buy that shit.”

It’s a bit sad though that Segway is licensing as well (wasn’t Steve Jobs holding shares of Segway?) but maybe they are just a shit company with a shit product. As most of the one licensing.

Comment by Seb

I know some people who would buy the LV tampon.
And in accordance with most LV stuff, would probably make sure you can see they are using LV.


Comment by Rob Mortimer

Are they the same people who would buy the gold shit pellets Mr M?

Remember them?


And how do you know what brothels smell like Seb? 🙂

Oh and Steve Jobs was/is an investor in Segway – I seem to think he described it as potentially one of the greatest inventions in mankinds history or something. Shows he can be wrong sometimes [which should be good news for Baz] but then the Segway guys managed to also pull the wool over the eyes of the Dreamworks/Amazon guys to name but a few.

Now excuse me, I have to go to the local Indian Restaurant and try to convince them to licence the Ferrari brand name.

The strategy?

“Our Ferrari curry’s are so hot and fast that it goes from mouth to shit in just 3 seconds”

Comment by Robert


Comment by Age

Andy told me.
Though I first thought he was referring to his gym when he said “the place where I get sweaty”. Naive me.

Comment by Seb

Sadly that slur will probably be read as a compliment by my wannabe sex fiend friend [when in reality he’s a lovely, loyal husband but no one is allowed to say that!]

Comment by Robert

[…] stable in its execution over the decades, but there’s been more than one occasion where – like Ferrari – they’ve fallen into the [ego] trap of […]

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