Filed under: Subliminal Hatred
Quick survey:
If a company – say an International Ad Agency – suddenly made a rule that stated whenever you wanted stationary – be it a pen or a pack of staples – you had to fill in a request form then [if approved] wait till the next coming Wednesday to get the items, what would you say?
Just to clarify: this means that if was a Thursday and you needed a paper clip, you would have to wait SIX FUCKING DAYS before you got it.
ONE WORD ANSWERS ONLY PLEASE
[PS: This has nothing to do with the post that asked whether you should still be able to call yourself ‘Agency Of The Year’ if you were awarded the title years ago, because that question – like this question – is fictitious and any resemblance to agencies practicing this behaviour is coincidental. Besides, who’d be that daft to do this eh?]
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Comment by lauren April 23, 2008 @ 12:01 pmVery Salvador Dali, Lauren – but this isn’t about ‘art’ it’s about ANSWERING THE BRIEF! 🙂
Comment by Robert April 23, 2008 @ 12:03 pmPlease fill up the ‘Requisition for Comment’ form and I’ll post next Friday.
Your co-operation is appreciated.
Comment by Ray & Friend April 23, 2008 @ 12:03 pmi don’t have such experiences with my new place.
tsk tsk.
Comment by Emah April 23, 2008 @ 12:13 pmPettyandstupidandinneedofakicking
Comment by Bazza April 23, 2008 @ 12:13 pmHello Emah – playing hooky in your new job again.
Of course you have no experience of this behaviour, no agency would ever do it, I’m just innocently asking.
As if I’d have hidden agendas in what I do.
Comment by Rob April 23, 2008 @ 12:15 pmI’m not playing hooky rob. U linked me this post thru msn!
**emah throws pink paperclips to rob**
Comment by Emah April 23, 2008 @ 12:21 pm(said to self)
EJECT
Comment by john c April 23, 2008 @ 12:27 pmAs a client I have the prerogative to continually change my mind which is why I am torn between responding with “embarrasing” and “dickensian”
May I ask how this imaginary company would expect you to fill in a form to request a pen if the reason you need one is because your current biro has run out?
Comment by Lee Hill April 23, 2008 @ 12:53 pmwell fuck off is two words and you only wanted one!!
ok, how about bureaucracy?
Comment by lauren April 23, 2008 @ 12:59 pmStop flirting with Andy, Lauren 😉
And yes Lee, very clever – so which came first, the chicken or the egg?
Comment by Robert April 23, 2008 @ 1:03 pmsteal
Comment by Tom from Perth April 23, 2008 @ 1:09 pmhttp://www.staples.com/
Comment by Charles Frith April 23, 2008 @ 1:23 pmKill
Comment by Michael Gladstone April 23, 2008 @ 1:30 pmridiculous
Comment by Nabilah April 23, 2008 @ 1:33 pmCockmunchers
There’s a rumor you’re leaving Asia to come and cause mass destruction in SF, is that true? If it is make sure you come and say hi, it’s been so long we even remember Andy fondly .
Comment by Tom K April 23, 2008 @ 1:54 pmStrike
Comment by DD April 23, 2008 @ 1:58 pmHello Tom – I’m in bloody shock you’ve written on here. How the hell did you find it – or more accurately – WHY did you find it, ha!
The rumours [note the spelling!] are sort-of true, but not quite … given you are posting comments on here at an unfriendly US hour, I assume you’re in my neck of the woods, so if your phone number hasn’t changed, I’ll give you a buzz.
Really great [and shocking] to hear from you!
Comment by Rob April 23, 2008 @ 2:23 pm“Dump.”
Being the cunning planner I am, this one word has dual meanings…
1. As in… “Dump” EVERY worthwhile doco/report/paper/presos/tools/files onto a portable hardrive or USB stick. STEAL all the valuable stuff you might need in the future.
2. Dump a resignation letter on the bosses desk.
>;p
Comment by Age April 23, 2008 @ 2:26 pmprison!
Comment by z April 23, 2008 @ 2:27 pmgoodbye
Comment by Marcus April 23, 2008 @ 2:34 pmhellokitty
Comment by Charles Frith April 23, 2008 @ 3:17 pmkiss
Comment by Charles Frith April 23, 2008 @ 3:20 pmmy
Comment by Charles Frith April 23, 2008 @ 3:20 pmass
Comment by Charles Frith April 23, 2008 @ 3:22 pmyou know, this is so unfair. There is one word, ONE VERY SIMPLE WORD, that we all want to say but we’re not allowed to say it on this blog.
We all know what that word is.
We all want to say it.
It is THE ULTIMATE word.
Comment by Marcus April 23, 2008 @ 3:33 pmChockybottyjocky?
Comment by Rob April 23, 2008 @ 3:35 pmLambent?
Comment by Charles Frith April 23, 2008 @ 3:35 pmThe ultimate word? Is that Ultimate then?
What about infinity?
Comment by Rob April 23, 2008 @ 3:38 pmYou know damn well what I mean Campbell.
Comment by Marcus April 23, 2008 @ 3:44 pmIs it a euphasmism for ‘Andy’?
Comment by Rob April 23, 2008 @ 3:46 pmI didn’t realise you thought Andy was a “God” Marcus – he will be pleased, but probably not entirely surprised!
Comment by Rob April 23, 2008 @ 3:50 pmBrilliant! Reduces the output of reports, mock-ups and bad creative in one fell swoop. Let’s hope some other agencies adopt it.
Comment by John Dodds April 23, 2008 @ 3:59 pmRob, can i remind you that u are in singapore. we prolly got systems even to go to the toilet.
Comment by Emah April 23, 2008 @ 5:49 pmas you boring planner types would say, ive just been brainstorming with trevor “fcuk” beattie about this and what we have come up with is “cnut”
that word also applies to dodds for his crap comment even though he was trying so hard to be funny.
been working on that for long dodgy? not fucking long enough mate.
Comment by andy@cynic April 23, 2008 @ 5:49 pmwhat the fuck is “prolly”?
if your english teacher spent less time thinking about doing the nasty with you and more time focusing on your grammar, you wouldnt write shit like that emah 🙂
Comment by andy@cynic April 23, 2008 @ 5:53 pmI am so sorry Emah … Mum … everyone who has been offended by Andy’s little comments.
The guy is drunk and stupid and I will deal with him very, very soon.
To make it worse, he rang me in the middle of an important meeting to tell me what he was about to do then kept ringing till I finally picked up [which was when my meeting finished] so he could proudly tell me he had pressed “SAY IT” and posted it.
It’s his wife I feel sorry for …
Comment by Rob April 23, 2008 @ 6:00 pmSince you are such an expert, Andy … why then is your wouldnt without a punctuation?
As in “wouldn’t”.
🙂
Comment by Emah April 23, 2008 @ 6:07 pmNice reply Emah – it’d be better if you’d used proper grammar [“without a punctuation”???] but it’s nice to see your aggresive nature is still alive and well despite your departure to BBH!
FYI, Andy is such a techno-twat that for him to use punctuation would result in each email/comment taking about 5 hours to write – because we actually like the bastard to be more effective, we tollerate his behaviour and get Katerina to check everything before it goes out.
Well, everything that actually could make money!
Miss you, you little bitch “)
Comment by Rob April 23, 2008 @ 6:14 pmsince when has anyone taken anything ive ever said seriously except a couple of religious fuckers and wives when i said “i do”
Comment by andy@cynic April 23, 2008 @ 6:25 pmGeorge … I don’t think you should expect Andy in today, I think he might ring up with a mild dose of man-flu 🙂
Comment by Rob April 23, 2008 @ 6:27 pmcheeky fuck but now you come to mention it i do feel a little peeky
Comment by andy@cynic April 23, 2008 @ 6:30 pmIf it’s any consolation Andy, I’m in the fucking dog house too.
Comment by Marcus April 23, 2008 @ 6:31 pmBad pint?
Comment by Rob April 23, 2008 @ 6:33 pmPints.
Comment by John Dodds April 23, 2008 @ 6:58 pmAndy truly is a role model for all.
Is this post your way to test some cost cutting shit Rob? If it is, my “word” would be shitinbossesdrawer
Comment by Billy Whizz April 23, 2008 @ 8:29 pmI’d say ‘Ehhhhh’ which is not even a word – replace maybe with ‘lol’ or alternatively ‘lolerskates’ or even the more pretentious ‘rofl’ for a reply to that rule.
You treat people like in kindergarten, they reply like in kindergarten!
Comment by Andrea April 24, 2008 @ 1:35 amdrunk
Comment by andy@cynic April 24, 2008 @ 6:23 amlaugh
Comment by Rob Mortimer April 24, 2008 @ 9:08 pm[…] And the queue for paper clips just gets longer, and longer. […]
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