The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

You Treat People Like They’re In Kindergarten, You Get Work Like They’re In Kindergarten …
April 23, 2008, 11:59 am
Filed under: Subliminal Hatred

Quick survey:

If a company – say an International Ad Agency – suddenly made a rule that stated whenever you wanted stationary – be it a pen or a pack of staples – you had to fill in a request form then [if approved] wait till the next coming Wednesday to get the items, what would you say?

Just to clarify: this means that if was a Thursday and you needed a paper clip, you would have to wait SIX FUCKING DAYS before you got it.


[PS: This has nothing to do with the post that asked whether you should still be able to call yourself ‘Agency Of The Year’ if you were awarded the title years ago, because that question – like this question – is fictitious and any resemblance to agencies practicing this behaviour is coincidental. Besides, who’d be that daft to do this eh?]

50 Comments so far
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Comment by lauren

Very Salvador Dali, Lauren – but this isn’t about ‘art’ it’s about ANSWERING THE BRIEF! πŸ™‚

Comment by Robert

Please fill up the ‘Requisition for Comment’ form and I’ll post next Friday.

Your co-operation is appreciated.

Comment by Ray & Friend

i don’t have such experiences with my new place.

tsk tsk.

Comment by Emah


Comment by Bazza

Hello Emah – playing hooky in your new job again.

Of course you have no experience of this behaviour, no agency would ever do it, I’m just innocently asking.

As if I’d have hidden agendas in what I do.

Comment by Rob

I’m not playing hooky rob. U linked me this post thru msn!

**emah throws pink paperclips to rob**

Comment by Emah

(said to self)


Comment by john c

As a client I have the prerogative to continually change my mind which is why I am torn between responding with “embarrasing” and “dickensian”

May I ask how this imaginary company would expect you to fill in a form to request a pen if the reason you need one is because your current biro has run out?

Comment by Lee Hill

well fuck off is two words and you only wanted one!!

ok, how about bureaucracy?

Comment by lauren

Stop flirting with Andy, Lauren πŸ˜‰

And yes Lee, very clever – so which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Comment by Robert


Comment by Tom from Perth


Comment by Michael Gladstone


Comment by Nabilah


There’s a rumor you’re leaving Asia to come and cause mass destruction in SF, is that true? If it is make sure you come and say hi, it’s been so long we even remember Andy fondly .

Comment by Tom K


Comment by DD

Hello Tom – I’m in bloody shock you’ve written on here. How the hell did you find it – or more accurately – WHY did you find it, ha!

The rumours [note the spelling!] are sort-of true, but not quite … given you are posting comments on here at an unfriendly US hour, I assume you’re in my neck of the woods, so if your phone number hasn’t changed, I’ll give you a buzz.

Really great [and shocking] to hear from you!

Comment by Rob


Being the cunning planner I am, this one word has dual meanings…

1. As in… “Dump” EVERY worthwhile doco/report/paper/presos/tools/files onto a portable hardrive or USB stick. STEAL all the valuable stuff you might need in the future.

2. Dump a resignation letter on the bosses desk.


Comment by Age


Comment by z


Comment by Marcus


Comment by Charles Frith


Comment by Charles Frith


Comment by Charles Frith


Comment by Charles Frith

you know, this is so unfair. There is one word, ONE VERY SIMPLE WORD, that we all want to say but we’re not allowed to say it on this blog.

We all know what that word is.

We all want to say it.

It is THE ULTIMATE word.

Comment by Marcus


Comment by Rob


Comment by Charles Frith

The ultimate word? Is that Ultimate then?

What about infinity?

Comment by Rob

You know damn well what I mean Campbell.

Comment by Marcus

Is it a euphasmism for ‘Andy’?

Comment by Rob

I didn’t realise you thought Andy was a “God” Marcus – he will be pleased, but probably not entirely surprised!

Comment by Rob

Brilliant! Reduces the output of reports, mock-ups and bad creative in one fell swoop. Let’s hope some other agencies adopt it.

Comment by John Dodds

Rob, can i remind you that u are in singapore. we prolly got systems even to go to the toilet.

Comment by Emah

as you boring planner types would say, ive just been brainstorming with trevor “fcuk” beattie about this and what we have come up with is “cnut”

that word also applies to dodds for his crap comment even though he was trying so hard to be funny.

been working on that for long dodgy? not fucking long enough mate.

Comment by andy@cynic

what the fuck is “prolly”?

if your english teacher spent less time thinking about doing the nasty with you and more time focusing on your grammar, you wouldnt write shit like that emah πŸ™‚

Comment by andy@cynic

I am so sorry Emah … Mum … everyone who has been offended by Andy’s little comments.

The guy is drunk and stupid and I will deal with him very, very soon.

To make it worse, he rang me in the middle of an important meeting to tell me what he was about to do then kept ringing till I finally picked up [which was when my meeting finished] so he could proudly tell me he had pressed “SAY IT” and posted it.

It’s his wife I feel sorry for …

Comment by Rob

Since you are such an expert, Andy … why then is your wouldnt without a punctuation?

As in “wouldn’t”.


Comment by Emah

Nice reply Emah – it’d be better if you’d used proper grammar [“without a punctuation”???] but it’s nice to see your aggresive nature is still alive and well despite your departure to BBH!

FYI, Andy is such a techno-twat that for him to use punctuation would result in each email/comment taking about 5 hours to write – because we actually like the bastard to be more effective, we tollerate his behaviour and get Katerina to check everything before it goes out.

Well, everything that actually could make money!

Miss you, you little bitch “)

Comment by Rob

since when has anyone taken anything ive ever said seriously except a couple of religious fuckers and wives when i said “i do”

Comment by andy@cynic

George … I don’t think you should expect Andy in today, I think he might ring up with a mild dose of man-flu πŸ™‚

Comment by Rob

cheeky fuck but now you come to mention it i do feel a little peeky

Comment by andy@cynic

If it’s any consolation Andy, I’m in the fucking dog house too.

Comment by Marcus

Bad pint?

Comment by Rob


Comment by John Dodds

Andy truly is a role model for all.

Is this post your way to test some cost cutting shit Rob? If it is, my “word” would be shitinbossesdrawer

Comment by Billy Whizz

I’d say ‘Ehhhhh’ which is not even a word – replace maybe with ‘lol’ or alternatively ‘lolerskates’ or even the more pretentious ‘rofl’ for a reply to that rule.

You treat people like in kindergarten, they reply like in kindergarten!

Comment by Andrea


Comment by andy@cynic


Comment by Rob Mortimer

[…] And the queue for paper clips just gets longer, and longer. […]

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