The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

There’s Meaning Behind Everything If You Look Hard Enough And Keep An Open Mind. [NB: This Isn’t As Serious As It Sounds And I’m Only Being So Prolific With My Blog Posts Today Because I’m Pontificating Over A Preso I Should Be Doing! Quelle Surprise!]
September 20, 2007, 7:05 pm
Filed under: Comment

Sherlock Holmes and Baker Street

One of the things I love about planning is finding out what caused things to happen.

Talking to the weird and wonderful in society … inviting contrary opinion … looking at where the World was/is to see how it influences actions … taking nothing for granted but not losing sight that in many cases people make decisions due to routine, simplicity or downright apathy … just being an inquisitive little fuck basically.

With all this in mind, I have a game for you and it all starts by you looking at this cute little boy …


Nice isn’t he? What an angelic little face he has.

Well can you see those 3 little dots along his nose?  What I want you to do is use your powers of deduction to work out what you think could be the cause of them.

I’ll start you off …

A marker pen?

Chicken pox?


Three bee stings all in a row? [There’s a clue there!]

Go on … you think of some and when you’re done, scroll down to see what the answer is.

Come on, have you really explored all the options?

What about it being a tribal tattoo?

Or maybe early acne?

OK … OK … scroll down to the answer …


OOOOOOOOOH, that must of hurt like fuck – poor little bastard.Alright … alright … I admit this whole post was just built around the fact that …

1 I wanted to show you these ‘food injury’ photos

2 Wanted to ensure there was enough space between the pics for maximum impact

… but if there is any ‘lesson’ in it [of which I admit there isn’t, hahaha] it’s that planning needs you to always look/think/collaborate with breadth and depth because otherwise you could be missing out on what the real ‘answer’ is to solving your particular problem.

Hahahahaha, that is the most patronising thing I have ever written, I’ll kick myself in the nuts on your behalf but I was just trying to desperately justify this post of which I now realise there was no need. Or point.

21 Comments so far
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Jesus christ, that is fucking disgusting Rob.

I love it. In a really really bad way.

Comment by Angus

Are you talking about the kid with the fork or the photos of Andy? Ha

Comment by Robert


Comment by Rob Mortimer

Why don’t you put some more inappropriate ideas in the minds of my innocent young children. Please do your presentation before you upset and destroy every relationship you have, both work and personal.

Comment by George

that kid fucking rocks. where the fuck did you get those pictures from? i want a kid like that.
now i dont know whats happened to you campbell, but married life seems to have made you pleasant. even when youre trying to piss me off you end up making me look and feel good, so the only conclusion i can come to is you have become gay and want to ride the marmite motorway with me. youre only human but as you know, i only pay huge divorce settlements to hot women, not ugly birkenstock wearing men.
going back to me for a moment, maybe angus and lauren would like to fight over who gets to touch my leper feet? they could do it in a paddling pool. filled with chocolate. on pay per view?
i cant wait to read what your next “put andy on a pedestal” stunt is going to be but i do think you should do your fucking presentation because you need to earn money for the alimony youre going to be soon paying jill.
is she ok by the way? better? see how nice i am showing concern to your wife? no wonder the chicks fucking dig me.

Comment by andy@cynic

It’s a very sad day for me – I have inadvertently made someone I wanted to humiliate, happy – and not because he’s some S&M freak, but because I’m crap! Bugger.
OK … OK … I’ll get on with what I need to do and yes Andy, you’re very kind to ask about Jill who is abit better but needs some specialist treatment because it’s all abit yucky.

[God that sounds dodgy doesn’t it but I’m talking about her teeth!]

I’m going to go home and look after the lil’ lady now AND do my work so sorry for writing so many stupid posts today and [hopefully] I’ll be a bit better [hahaha!] on Monday.

Have a toptastic weekend all … 🙁

Comment by Rob

Andy, Lauren and I will fight over who gets to hold the video camera to film you riding the marmite highway with Rob, okay? (Excellent phrase by the way)

Comment by Angus

i dont like the way you imply id be doing the riding angus.

if there was going to be any gay sex around here, id be the fucking plug and campbell would be the female socket.

you like the “marmite motorway” phrase do you? theres fucking loads more where that came from and its not homophobic as our lovely gay art director anton, tells me them all. theres something kind of wrong in that isnt there?

off you go campbell, go earn your keep and stop the divorce starting while youre at it. ill call you soon. with lawyers names.

Comment by andy@cynic

Of course it’s not homophobic. Gay passion is nothing to be ashamed of Andy, be you the pitcher OR the catcher.

Night night Campbell.

Comment by Angus

being gay just means youre a mans man doesnt it?

Comment by andy@cynic

Andy, you want a son who is so keen on eating he tries to eat his fork but completely misses his mouth?

Like father like son then…!

Comment by Rob Mortimer

dont knock it till youve tried it mortimer. thats another thing anton told me.

Comment by andy@cynic

Is it International drug taking day because this blog has gone even more mental than usual. What’s scarier is it’s the posts that are more insane than the comments. Stop pontificating and do your work Robert, this is a side of you that makes me feel uncomfortable. 🙂

Comment by Pete

fucking wimp

Comment by andy@cynic

Have I ever claimed anything different?

Comment by Pete

fucking quiet around here innit?

Comment by andy@cynic

jesus christ! a girl goes away for a couple of days and comes back to this madness! rob – if you want sick injury pics, i’ll find you the vid of the guy busting his femur grinding a rail on (well actually off) a skateboard – it’ll make you want to retch.
andy, sweetness, has anyone ever told you that you look like orson welles?
angus – you can film, i’ll sell the tickets and popcorn
jill – hope you’re feeling better soon – gargle whiskey to fix a toothache.

Comment by lauren

God I’ve missed this blog whilst you’ve been away, Rob…

Comment by Age

Oh my god, that is sick. I still keep putting my hand up to my nose an hour after reading your post. And I even guessed that the dots were real holes before I scrolled down and saw the pics. I take it you like advertising that shocks then? I suspect you’re one of those people that finds practical jokes hilarious too. Poor little chap (the kiddie in the picture, not you).

Comment by Rachel

Oi Rachel – I’ve been looking for you and to prove it, go here …

… and to answer your question about me being a bastard who likes scaring/upsetting kiddies, I say look at this …

… now get in bloody touch! 🙂

Comment by Robert

I bloody will! Watch this space…

Comment by Rachel

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