OK, after all the dramas of the Sausage v Bacon debate [which I think we won], I think it’s time to get back to normal. There are many reasons for this decision …
1 Andy will have a heart-attack if he carries on at the rate he is going.
2 Andy will have hitmen looking for him if he keeps the level of aggressiveness he’s been displaying.
3 Andy will live in a bus shelter if he doesn’t start doing some work for his living, breathing and PAYING clients.
4 Andy’s wife will leave him if he eats one more sausage. [it’s his 3rd wife and while he has managed to ‘snag’ some of the World’s most beautiful women, this trend can’t continue given his facial issues]
5 I sort-of hate the fact some sausages caused more debate on my blog than when I opened up my heart and answered 10 very personal questions, ha!
Sooooooo … lets all take a deep breath and move on shall we?
Oh, and before I go, please squint and have a look at the email below. It’s from dear Andy detailing his 5 little known facts in answer to Rob ‘Where Has He Gone?’ Mortimer’s ‘tagging’.
The reason he is doing this via me is that he can’t remember the password to his blog and out IT guy has refused to help him given he’s the reason we get so much spam each day.
Whilst he has missed out the really juicy stuff – he has at least taken it seriously and even shown his softer side’ – which is always there even though he pretends its not.
Alright … alright … you can’t read it can you?
Well this is what he say’s …
_________________________________________________________________
“Hello Rob.
Before I forget, here’s the 5 things about me that Mortimer wanted to know.
Unlike you, I’ve kept them Andy-friendly. Do with them what you will and I’ll see you soon.
AB
1 I once set up lunch with Heather Graham under the pretence of casting her for an ad because I fancied her and was convinced she fancied me. She came to lunch [with her manager], was lovely, but sparks didn’t fly.
2 I have over 40,000 CD’s.
3 I once vomited on a new clients desk at our first formal meeting because I was badly, badly hungover from the night before. We bonded over it and he’s still one of our best clients.
4 I have been engaged 5 times and married 3. The latest wife is the one I had been searching for. I am 39 and in love.
5 I went 9 months without ever once attending my French class. It hasn’t done me any harm.”