As you might have guessed from the title of this post, I’m not here.
No, honestly I’m not … this is the future me writing this post.
In fact, to be totally precise, this is me from 2057 where I am a sprightly 87 years old.
I could tell you everything that happens between 2013 and today, but as I don’t know how long I’ve got left to live, I will just give you a topline on all the issues you really care about.
You know all those dreams you had that you’d strike it rich or that adland would change and be the ignition for the greatest cultural change ever seen or that I’d start writing shorter posts and hating Queen and Birkenstocks?
One word: Nope.
Sorry.
In fact the only good news I have for you is that I don’t write any more blog posts from today till next Monday.
OK, so that might not please you as much as learning you’re going to be a trillionaire or that you’re going to marry some supermodel [which you’re not], but it’s better than nothing isn’t it?
No?
Well screw you, you bunch of little princes and princesses.
Anyway, because I’m writing this post from the future, I thought I’d give you the chance to experience what I’m experiencing, so given I am currently in Detroit – the “Motor City” [or I was when I wrote this post – which doesn’t make sense, given I said I was writing this from the future … which means the whole premise of this post is fucked], I will give you the chance to see what British folks thought of their cars back in the 1990’s.
Yes, the 1990’s … when most of you sods were probably in kindergarten.
Bastards.
Now even though I know most of you will have already watched it because the very lovely Russell wrote about it ages ago, it’s still worth a look … though I have to say I’d be interested to see what the response would be like if it was filmed today given the once elite car brands – like BMW – now outnumber the classic rep vehicles – like the Ford Mondeo – on British roads these days.
Anyway, enough of all that, just enjoy watching the tragedy that was the British car driver back in the early 90’s and – because I am in the future so know this stuff – I will definitely see you on Monday.
