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Scattergun Media Strategy …

A while back I wrote about an ad for environmentally friendly cleaning products that appeared in FHM Singapore …

Well I can only assume the salesperson who flogged that moment of irrelevant genius has jumped ship to Maxim because in this month’s edition there was an ad for this …

Yep, a carbon monoxide detector for cars!

OK, so men’s mags are ‘bloke bibles’ – which means the car is right up there with babes, gadgets and clobber – but a carbon monoxide detector??

To be fair to the salesman, he/she managed to con the editorial staff into running a feature on the dangers of having sex in your car with the engine on – but given there was only one reported death from this activity in the last 12 months [and millions get upto it on a daily basis and some of them might even be Singaporeans. I did say ‘might’] I don’t know if these facts are really going to motivate people to cough up the dosh for the gadget.

OK, so cars in Singapore cost a bloody fortune and the whole culture is ‘fear operated’ but even then, people don’t buy Maxim to be reminded of their family responsibilities – they buy it to oogle some female flesh and read the very interesting and intellectual articles [that’s my excuse and I’m sticking with it]

I hope it works for them – they must have paid a fortune for it, especially as they made the ‘ad’ an insert [see below] – but all things considered, I think this is another example of bullshit communication or brilliant salesmanship.

Still, it’s not as bad as the shitty sponsorship ads I see where some company tries to link their product with the event they’ve sponsored even though the reality is they did it because [1] it was cheap [2] it was what the MD wanted [3] it was to shut up the competition [4] it was for distribution rights [5] it was for internal/key client relationships.

There’s a great one from Castrol – the engine oil – for their sponsorship of Euro 2008.

They’ve basically linked the fact that a successful football team is ready to go from the moment the whistle blows to the fact that their product makes a car ready to go from the moment you turn the ignition key.

Genius … but shit.

I tell you I’d have a damn sight more respect for them if they simply said, “We Love Football So We Sponsor Football” … but in these days of having to justify every cent, let alone every dollar, I can only assume that sort of pragmatism wouldn’t wash with the powers-that-be, even if it would make more people notice their sponsorship and like the company behind it.

I’ve said it many times, but corporate ego is behind some of the biggest business fuckups in history and lets be honest, it’s going to get a whole lot worse before it gets worse [ha!] so as a bit of fun – and to see how creative the people on this blog really are – I would like you to suggest how Huggies Nappies could corporately justify their sponsorship of tennis championship, Wimbledon.

Just incase some petty brand manager is reading this, I should point out this is purely a fictious association, I just want to see what your evil little brains come up with …

Right, over to you copywriting Saints/Sinners …

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