So this weekend, Jill and I were huddled around our phone in Singapore listening in as our lawyer bid for a house in Balmain that we not only loved, but were assured was ‘ours to lose’.
And guess what … we lost!
We had given our lawyer the maximum amount we’d offer because …
1 He was there
2 He would be immune from the ’emotional premium’ people tend to pay when they’re at an auction for a house they love
… however it still didn’t stop me screaming to up our offer at the last second and end up feeling absolutely and totally gutted when immediately, we were out bid by a guy who seemed to not care he was paying absolute top dollar. [Can you hear the jealousy in my voice, ha!]
Anyway, whilst I could rant about how bloody flawed the house auction process is in Australia … or how we need Estate Agents who act on the behalf of the buyer as well as the seller … the thing I realised is that I haven’t put myself in a position for such disappointment in a long, long time.
That’s not to say everything in my life has turned out as I hoped … God no … but interms of actually putting myself in a situation where I can immediately [and undeniably] judge myself as either a ‘winner’ or a ‘loser’ … well, it’s been a long, long time and I have a sneaky suspicion I am not alone in this.
This doesn’t mean I only associate/do things that guarantee success and happiness … if only … I just think many people [including me] have a ‘subliminal inner guidance system’ that exists to minimise the chance of ever experiencing extreme disappointment [which as a byproduct, means minimising the chance of also experiencing extreme joy] – which results in us living – more often than not – a life of ‘mid-level satisfaction’.
Hence the jobs we choose, the places we visit, the goals we set etc etc are often not nearly as pragmatic as we would like/hope because we don’t want to find ourselves in a situation where we have to accept the undeniable fact we’re not good enough / brave enough / rich enough / successful enough.In short, we are a generation about comfort – or if I want to be more extreme about it, denial.
Of course I could be talking total bollocks … but before you slag me off, ask yourself when was the last time you did something truly outside of your comfort zone?
OK … now you can slag me off, ha!
Ironically, what I am talking about is not only prevalent throughout Asia – but celebrated.
The theory of Yin Yang [the ‘balance’ between extremes] is embraced in all aspects of life – be it personal, professional or business.
Infact, it is so entrenched within society that it is genuinely hard to find anything that offers an ‘extreme’ out here – even down to the glasses of water you are given in meetings, which are often served ‘luke warm’ rather than cold or hot.
I guess the older I get, the more conscious I have to be that I can easily slip into ‘middle ground’ achievement mode – and given I’ve always been brought up [and followed] the philosophy of chasing the things that were the most important and exciting to me, that would be a terrible shame.
On the plus side, it does help explain why one of IBM’s most successful campaigns featured the line: “No one ever got fired for buying IBM”
Anyway, enough of my whinging and complaining … time to get back to work – especially as I am now a fully fledged Asian Resident and you know how obsessed they are with work, ha!