The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

There’s Effectiveness & There’s Effectiveness …
May 7, 2012, 6:10 am
Filed under: Comment

Hello, I’m back.


I know you did your best to get immigration to arrest me, but I’m afraid you failed.

Oh well, there’s always next time.

So the last proper post I wrote was about the presentation Chaz, from BBH, and I were giving at the Asian Effectiveness Awards.

In it, we highlighted 5 ‘truths’ about Asian marketing that are, errrrrm, not quite as true as they’d like to believe.

Of course this was all wrapped up in the theme of ‘being more effective’ … but the thing we didn’t talk about is that ‘effectiveness is relative’.

Sure, at the end of the day, it all revolves around the point that what you invest gets you – at worst – an equal amount of value back, but as an industry we don’t really go into the details, preferring instead to talk about effectiveness as an all-encompassing term, something that gives us the flexibility to reinterpret what ‘effectiveness is’ to suit our particular needs.

Like fucking awareness.

But I digress.

The reason I say all this is because Rodi recently pointed me to an article that highlighted the sort of effectiveness most agencies could only dream about achieving … where the return isn’t just quantifiable in genuine commercial terms, but is like winning the lottery of business.

Would you like to get $14 back for every $1 invested in the US?

What about $11 for every $1 you spend in the rest of the World?

You bet your sweet ass you would.

Of course, with returns so high, there’s always going to be an element of risk … but then so is putting a couple of million bucks into a television campaign when it’s been designed to please a board of directors rather than your audience.

So what is this license to print money?

That’s right, it’s government bribery.

So next time I am asked to judge communication effectiveness, I think I’m going to judge everything by this simple 3 criteria:

1. Has it quantifiably and financially benefited the brand?

2. Did the brand actively do something to encourage this or have they simply benefited from fortunate circumstance &/or distribution?

3. Could they have made more with a bribe?

Don’t laugh, while #1 & #2 might be the basis for identifying genuine effectiveness, #3 might be the only way to get big business to start looking at adland again.


youre from the crime capital of fucking europe.
you talk to prostitutes and drug dealers for “insights”.
you have mingled with dodgy fuckers ever since ive known you.
dont fucking blame rodi for your twisted shit campbell.

Comment by andy@cynic

Well if you hadn’t been in Canada when Rodi was in NYC you’d realise that Rodi is me on steroids. Well, in terms of devious shit anyway.

Comment by Rob

beat you doddsy.

Comment by andy@cynic

any fucker should of known that spud farmer was corrupt, he wasnt fucking irish.

Comment by andy@cynic

criteria #4.
is the entry submitter female?

criteria #5.
if yes, is she hot.

criteria #6.
does she have self esteem issues.

Comment by andy@cynic

oi campbell, you here all week or have you got some fucking flight to catch so you can talk bollocks on someone elses fucking dime. as long as its not mine anymore i dont give a fucking shit.

Comment by andy@cynic

Let’s hope he’s got another freebie holiday/conference or it’s a week of blog bollocks.

Comment by DH

good fucking point dave.

Comment by andy@cynic

14:1 isnt as good as your fucking concorde pyramid bastard scheme is it you jammy, jammy bastard.

Comment by andy@cynic

Only Rob could succeed against the Bernie Madoff of adland.

He has a deal with Mr Satan, it’s the only plausible reason he’s so lucky.

Comment by DH

so youve finally come over to my side. about fucking time.

Comment by andy@cynic

I have. But to be fair to Rob, he’s not as jammy as Bazza.

Comment by DH

That was a very long time ago. I was young and I most definitely needed the money. Ha.

Comment by Rob

well you fucking got it didnt you. jammy shit.

Comment by andy@cynic

Welcome back Rob. The report as regards the value of bribery is interesting (though I’m unsure to its accuracy) but that doesn’t mean adland is ineffective or incapable of achieving similar results, even if it under more exceptional circumstances.

As for your criteria for judging effectiveness (excluding your #3 and all of Andy’s) if more people used your main criteria rather than being seduced by a snazzy entry video, maybe the industry would be more respected by business.

Comment by Pete

fuck you pete, at least my criteria end up giving the judges some benefit for sitting through 100 submissions of brain rape.

Comment by andy@cynic

I’m not saying adland is incapable of being effective – that would be pretty stupid of me and while I’m no superbrain, I’m not Mr Thick either.

All I’m saying is that there is [questionable] evidence to suggest bribery is more effective for companies than many ad campaigns and given so many in business only care about the bottom line, it’s time to look at our broader competitors – legal or otherwise – so we can at least appreciate what they’re doing and how they’re doing it … though obviously I’m not advocating doing anything dodgy. Oh no. Oh no, no, no, no, no.

Comment by Rob

course youre not campbell. course youre not.

Comment by andy@cynic

You won’t get $14 or even $11 back if you try and bribe the Spanish or Greek governments. Actually you would, but that’s all you’d get back.

Comment by DH

political. who the fuck do you think you are, ben fucking elton.

if you write another shit queen musical im not to blame for the kicking youll be receiving.

Comment by andy@cynic

I would kill myself before I did that.

Comment by DH

I’m impressed Dave. Not at your joke, but that you know there’s a load of stuff going on outside of your self importance bubble.

Comment by Rob

fighting talk campbell. hit him dave. ill hold him down.

Comment by andy@cynic

I just have to play him a smiths song.

Comment by DH

this post really grabbed peoples attention didnt it. not one fucking comment since daves bollocks hours ago. maybe the pricks on here do have some fucking taste after all.

or its a national fucking holiday.

or theyre drunk.

or dead.

Comment by andy@cynic

All of the above?

And yes, I’m up hideously early. And no, I’m not happy about it either.

Comment by Rob

putting in a few extra hours of doing absolutely fuck all are you campbell?

Comment by andy@cynic

Another serious evidence you’ve been in communists’ land for way too long. Bribery is now officially labeled as a “Chinese cultural insight” – according to Americans’ jurisdiction system. How proud should we be.

Comment by Angel Xie

we dont want the fucker back.

Comment by andy@cynic

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