The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

China Makes The World A Better Place. Till My VPN Is Up & Running …
June 3, 2010, 5:35 am
Filed under: Comment

So today is my last regular blog post for the foreseeable future.

There’s a few reasons for this …

1/ I piss off on my ‘deny I’m 40’ birthday tour tomorrow … which means, on pain of death … I will not be allowed anywhere near email/internet, let alone have the time to write anything.

2/ Even if I don’t get arrested while away [which happens more regularly than you’d think] when I come back, I only have a couple of days to pack up the house before buggering off to Shanghai so blogging will definitely not be high on the agenda.

3/ Once in China, I only have 5 days to find a house before I start my new life/job, which means even if I did have internet access [which I won’t], I’d still have to contend with the lovely Great Firewall of China banning my blog.

4/ The very first day I start at W+K, I fly to Portland [Whoohoo!] so my brain will be occupied with ‘new job immersion/brainwashing’ rather than writing yet more pointless twaddle.

5/ Once I’m back in the capital of communism, I have to give precedence to getting to know my team, my clients and my life – so pissing about on the internet and writing toss will just have to wait.

Now I appreciate all this blog interruption is probably great news to you, for me, it’s a major thing because even though you wouldn’t know it, writing my daily rant helps me think or at least clear my head so I can think … so for the next few months, I pity anyone who has to work with me because no doubt I’ll be even more of a basket case than I usually am.

Saying that, there will be the occasional blog post … I can tell you that there’s already one written for the 12th June [my birthday], 15th June [Jill’s birthday] and the 16th June [Paul’s birthday] and no doubt there’ll be the odd one shoved in every now and then either talking about how I’ve been arrested by the Chinese Government and/or my first impressions of being an employee again [not to mention the results of the A[P]SOTW] … but until then, I just wanted to say a big thanks to everyone for your friendship, insults and advice over the 4 years this pile of toss has been running and even if it means I am a fucking idiot, I look forward to reading your comments/slurs when I’ve finally got a bit settled and this blog is back to being as regular as a man who eats fibre each day.*

When I come back I’ll be 40 and living in China.

God help us all.

* Either early Aug, or 2057!

46 Comments so far
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So long, and thanks for all the fish/chuckles

Comment by Simon Kendrick

Thank God that’s over.

Comment by John

hes gone to see pauls cock.

Comment by andy@cynic

your daily writing is one bad habit i hate to break.

you owe me anwers to certain ‘devious’ questions and insights, so you’ll be back.

though my cousins are hoping you renege..

Comment by niko

No one comes here the posts so we can carry on like nothings happened which is what normally happens.

Comment by Billy Whizz

I don’t know if I feel more sorry for wieden or china.

Comment by DH

Decided. I feel more sorry for China because wieden asked Rob to come to them.

Comment by DH

I thought he’d never go.

Try and have a good time between all the stress and frustration. Looking forward to my daily dose live from China.

Comment by Bazza

fuck – I felt like I only just got to know you – well your blogatar at least

Comment by simonbilling

Hi Simon … good to have you come by though let me reassure you that [1] I will be back and [2] when I am, you will regret your comment.

Comment by Rob

What a lovely bunch of friends I have.

And bad luck suckers because this doesn’t mean you’re free of me, it just means you’re free from me for a bit.

So, as my delightful Andy would say, EAT SHIT.


Comment by Rob

Good luck mate!!

Comment by Age

This is sad. Have fun on your birthday tour Rob and looking forward to reading the Chinese version.

Comment by Rafik

Sad in the sense that I’ll be coming back?

Comment by Rob

Good luck sir

Comment by -D-

Technically you already live in China and apparently you’ve been 40 for years, so i don’t know what all the fuss is about


i hope the work transition is smooth lovely and that you’re birthday is rough as fuck.

when you get back, I’ll be 33 and living in Europe. so ’tis.

Comment by lauren

Will you be living in Europe fulltime???


Comment by Rob

well, technically i’ll be a tourist of the united kingdom. for 6 months. spending a lot of travelling around europe. especially in berlin. ahem.

Comment by lauren

which i realise doesn’t necessarily give you answers, but further questions.

Comment by lauren

With a response like that, you should be a politician. Actually you should be a politician fullstop … let’s face it, you’d do a much better job than the mob who tend to do it.

And does this mean you’re going to see your husband in Blighty? I’m sure John is beside himself with excitement.

Comment by Rob

oh. yeah. i guess i should probably go and do that. 😉

Comment by lauren

Just set up a series of empty posts, we’ll all comment happily.
On a less juvenile note, good luck, you will be missed, don’t get incarcerated, has Dan Weiden seen your blog?

Comment by northern

I’ve not died Northern … you do realise I’m coming back as soon as I’m settled in Commieland don’t you?

And – scarily – Mr Wieden [you spelt it wrong, maybe just for my benefit] does know about my blog though the rumour he only found out about it after I signed the papers is pure speculation.

And I’ve pre-written some blog posts, so the gap between today and probably the end of July won’t be completely empty. Bad luck. Ha.

Comment by Rob

I would also say I don’t have to set up any empty posts given everyone natters happily away ignoring whatever bollocks I’ve slaved over writing for your amusement.

[OK, it has nothing to do with your amusement, but I wanted to sound like those tits on American Idol who say “I’d like to thank all my fans” when they’ve only been on the show 2 minutes. Tits]

Comment by Rob

However, amused I am

Comment by northern

I aim to please.

Comment by Rob

god speed old man.

Comment by katie dreke

I’ll be the one to say it then. This post has made me very sad. It feels like something rather special has come to an end as this blog was, for many of us, something special and important. This posts were shite of course, but we all love you and I think we all love each other a little bit too. Even Boucher.

And you mum hangs out here too for God’s sake.

Thank you for being one of the very (VERY) few he just kept going. On a personal note – thank you for being such a huge support of the last four years.

It’s a shit blog, but you’re a lovely man.


Comment by Marcus

Did my post about Paul’s penis make you gay Marcus?

In all seriousness, I am very, very, very touched by your lovely words, it means a hell of a lot however I am a bit embarassed because I’m not stopping the blog, I’m just stopping the daily updates till I’m a bit settled in China.

The reason I say this is because I don’t want people to accuse me of trying to be Tom Jones/KISS/John Farnham who have had more ‘comebacks’ than Jesus.

So I love that you love me, but I’m not going to be gone for too long … especially as I have already pre-written 6 posts for the coming weeks.

Sorry. Ha.

Comment by Rob


Comment by Marcus

hmmpf. Shit blog. Where did my luvvie comment go?

Comment by Marcus

[Cue: Pantomime Chant]

“It’s behind you” [Except it isn’t, it’s above you]

Comment by Rob

youre all such a bunch of drama fuckers. same fucking thing happened when google made the 2nd biggest mistake of their nerdy lives but he was back within 6 weeks boring the fucking crap out of us like nothing had happened and in another 6 weeks the same will happen here.

ok so he will be an oap in china having to work for a fucking living so well have to put up with the odd post about farrah slacks, communism and incontinence but we have to put up with pointless and irrelevant bollocks now so there wont be too much change.

i know everyones real fear is i wont be here anymore but youre wrong because my job is to keep campbell and planning in check plus theres no fucking way im spending the next 2 years of my life watching a bunch of cowboy builders destroy my fucking finances without having an outlet to destroy, insult and humiliate.

as i said. drama fucking queens.

Comment by andy@cynic

Was ensuring the continuation of this blog Google’s biggest mistake or third biggest?

Comment by John

ha ..farrah slacks. Nice one Andy.

Comment by Charles 'values' Frith

isnt it nice without any campbell shit?

fucking lovely.

Comment by andy@cynic

Hello, good morning.
I hope you’re all fine.

So I come back after such a long time only to see that you have this big break. I hope it won’t be as big as my two year ongoing goodbye blogging time. And I have written that email I promised you 9 months ago. I hope your email still works.

Have a good start.

Comment by Seb

i thought germans were fucking efficient but heres seb about a year fucking late.

good to have you back and when campbell comes back from behind the commie curtain i hope youll join me in giving the bastard a real and metafuckingphorical kicking.

Comment by andy@cynic

Andy, it would be a lie to say that I did not miss your rants. Fuck you very much. That is the new thank you, you know.

Comment by Seb

of course i know. i fucking invented it.

Comment by andy@cynic


Comment by Marcus

fucking flatterer.

Comment by andy@cynic

Rob, I’ll miss you too. You’re light years away from my world…your mom shouldn’t be reading any of this, though. Will be waiting to hear what happens next!

Comment by adchick

When you say light years away, you mean Rob’s way behind you, right?

Been arrested in El Salvador or whichever country you’re sponging off right now? Make sure you ask for a computer and internet access to start blogging again. 🙂

Comment by DH

dont be a wanker dave, campbell isnt light fucking years behind the rest of the world, just 20.

Comment by andy@cynic

happy fourfuckinghundredth birthday campbell. if you thought your life was fucked before wait till you see what life has instore for you now.

Comment by andy@cynic

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