The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

31 Days …
December 1, 2009, 6:03 am
Filed under: Comment

So today is December 1st and in just under 5 weeks, we’ll be in 2010.

I find that amazing because I still think the 90’s were only a couple of years ago … so even though it makes me sound like an old fart, I have to ask where the hell does time go!?

My wife has a theory about this which is basically …

If you are 6 years old, then 1 year is equal to 1/6 of your life, just like if you are 60 years of age, then that represents 1/60th of your life … therefore over time, a year becomes a smaller & smaller proportion of your overall life and therefore feels shorter.

To be honest, I’m still trying to get my head around that concept but what I do know is that when I read a magazine and it features someone who says they were born in 1990, my first reaction is that they look old for their age before remembering that it’s 2009, not 1999 so they’re almost bloody twenty which means I’m a bloody old fart who is nearly 40.


Jesus, the next significant age after that is 50.


And then I’m only 10 short years till retirement and waiting for the grim reaper to come and get me.


Christ, where did that all come from? Sorry about that – kinda lost it there for a minute – and given my Mum still goes to rock concerts at nearly 80 [even if it was because she thought the Electric Light Orchestra [ELO] were a symphony group rather than 70’s Rock Gods] I guess I am not destined to be one of those people sitting at home in my slippers watching Coronation Street and complaining how the streets were safe ‘back in my day’.

That’s kind of disappointing because it sounds quite nice.

DSC00723.JPG Remember, loose lips sink careers.

Anyway, over the next few weeks, I am sure we’re going to be inundated with blog posts detailing the authors year … and I bet I am not going to be an exception … so instead of boring everyone stupid, why don’t we have a bit of fun and reinstate that character assassinating questionnaire NP and Mr M subjected me to a few years ago and develop a set of probing questions – all linked to our individual activities of the last 12 months – which we all have to answer on a designated day prior to buggering off for whatever festive break we’re getting?

Think of the opportunities …




Get the idea?

OK, to allow people a little modesty, my thought is we come up with 15 questions of which the recipient can choose to answer any 10 from. Sound alright?

In that case, think of what question you would like to ask [remembering you’ll quite possibly have to answer it as well] and let the journey of depraved discovery begin …

25 Comments so far
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More evidence for Jill when she sues you for her “Jillyism” blog. Still trying to think through her theory but isn’t complication a sign of genius?

It’s not December here yet so I don’t have to think where the year has gone so instead I will nominate a question for consideration safe that if you still have a job after your revelations of a few years ago, I should be safe when I have to answer.

My question is: “name the most stupid question you had from a client and colleague in the last 12 months”.

I hope when we look back at this, we can all still laugh rather than be walking the streets. LOL.

Comment by Pete

What’s the point?

Comment by John

If you’re like this at the relatively young age of 39, I am frightened how you’ll be acting in 10 years time.

Actually 39 is ancient so I understand why you must be at your wits end. 🙂

I like the idea of mass character assassination but can you be sure everyone will be as honest/stupid as you Robert?

I am guessing you won’t let me use this as a chance to do some research on our longtail product plan so my nomination for question is “what single thing do you wish you could go back and change from the last year?”

What date are we supposed to answer all these by the way?

Comment by Bazza

Sorry Pete and Baz – it’s all off, Mr John “Scrooge” Dodds has spoken and unless it has some specific benefit, then it’s pointless and should be kept in the ‘waste of time’ bucket.

But hang on … if that was the case this blog should have been put away years ago so sod him and keep them coming and depending how many people actually bother with questions, we’ll set a date for character suicide. Deal?

Comment by Rob

I was asking a broader question of everyone – as requested.

Comment by John

Nice idea.

My contribution…

“Define the year you’ve just had in 3 or less words”

“Define the year you hope to have next year in 3 or less words”

Comment by Age

Since when have we taken notice of what John Dodds says? 🙂

Comment by Bazza

Seediest thing you’ve done all year.

Comment by DH

If everything you’ve done/said/thought in the last year was suddenly made public, what’s the first thing you’d hide?

Comment by rafik

Excellent questions from the comments section.

My contribution:
Who did you most often visualise naked?

Comment by Angus

I think your question is easy Angus – it’s Andy – to delay certain ‘reactions’ from occurring.

God I feel sick even writing that …

Comment by Rob

This is all going to end in tears.

Comment by Lee Hill

We’re so similar Rob, although I confess I like to visualise him on all fours.

Comment by Angus

And the winner of the sickest visual image of 2009 issssssssssssssssssss …. ANGUS!

Come on down and get your mind and mouth thoroughly scrubbed with acid.

Comment by Rob

I’m so proud.

Comment by Angus

What’s the rudest thing you muttered under your breath to a client when leaving the room/putting the phone down?

Comment by Rob Mortimer

Under your breath? Wimp. 🙂

Comment by Rob

who did u like most last year (based on ideas, comments, paycheck, etc)?


Comment by damian

To make this a group that doesn’t consist all of 6 people (Angus, Rob, JD, Bazza, Pete, Damian), here’s my question: how many times in the past year did you wish you were working in something other than advertising? And don’t give me the ‘i love advertising, it’s all I’ve ever wanted to do’ nonsense. Thanks much. 😀

Comment by Anjali Ramachandran

how many times did you wish you were me?

Comment by andy@cynic

How many client freebies did you get? Rob has to include virgin flights. To the nearest hundred.

Comment by Billy Whizz

I would like to know how much time people think they have wasted writing blogs rather than doing the work they have been paid for. Maybe that question should only be directed to Robert.

Comment by George

Considering all of the wrong, the hatred, the hurt, the pain, the suffering, the hunger and all of the sorrow in the world was anything you did this year really worthwhile?

I feel that I may have to bullet point that for some of you.

Comment by Marcus

Your horse is high, Sir Marcus.

Comment by Angus

You make it sound like selling flights to the public isn’t a worthwhile cause Marcus.

Comment by Rob

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