The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Girth Hour …
March 6, 2009, 7:00 am
Filed under: Comment

Photo: Capt Alcoholica

So Earth Hour is going to be on us yet again and like every year, I go away a bit more confused than happy.

The principal behind Earth Hour is great – raising awareness of the World’s impending environmental catastrophe – however like most advertising today, it seems happier promoting the problem rather than solving it.

Of course this is totally understandable when you remember the people behind the original concept were ad/marketing folk – Leo Burnett’s Sydney and Fairfax. [or it could be News Ltd, I can’t remember, but whoever it was, Leo’s were the ones who leveraged the idea to the greatest extent]

Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate any action is good … and I appreciate that to truly turn this situation around requires some major, major changes – changes that go beyond you, I and countless billions of other ‘normal’ people – however for all the visual impact it has when the World presses ‘off’, it’s seemingly not changing people’s long-term attitudes towards climate change given the environmental issues are continuing to get worse rather than better.

Have I got the answer – no, and besides when you appreciate that for some developing nations, the environment will always play a distant 2nd to their quest for economic growth/strength/stability, you realise this is something the West may have to lead even though they’ll do all they can to resist, claiming it will undermine their own economic needs, despite the fact for many of them, they got to be so far ahead because they treated the environment with a similar distain as a man who ‘inherits’ a ginger haired step son – I am simply stating that we seem to be developing into a culture that is more about ‘impression’ than ‘action’, but hey … I’m as guilty as the next person … but not as guilty as this one. 🙂

Anyway, I’m going totally off track because at cynic we’ve decided to hold ‘Girth Hour’ during ‘Earth Hour’ which basically means stocking up on as much chemical ridden food as we can possibly get our hands on, and getting sponsored for each bag of crisps we can scoff down in an hour.

It’s abit of an unfair challenge given Andy’s creds in this arena, but given he has to also drink a bottle of beer inbetween each bag and being sick means you have to give $250 of your sponsorship cash to the other participants [it’s all going to the homeless] means it is anyone’s guess who will be crowned King [or Queen] of the “If You Are What You Eat, Then We’re Going To Be Crisps” challenge.

I have no idea why I have written this post – but then that’s the case with most of them isn’t it!

13 Comments so far
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i was born to do this and im going to show you food and booze wimps how fucking committed i am to save the world.

funny how only the men have signed up for our version of live aid with food. so much for womens fucking nurturing and caring instincts, its like theres some fucking female law against consuming shit loads of booze and e numbered crisps.

hey ladies were not doing this for fucking fun were sacrificing our health for the planet, you should be afuckingshamed of yourselves. and that includes all the wives of the cynic partners who to a fucking woman adopted a face like a bulldog licking piss off a netal when told of our plan.

is it too much to expect some fucking support, love and looks of bravery and pride? no wonder theres so many single chicks in the world if they act like this. were fucking modern day food gladiators and they look on us with pity muttering were just immature fat bastard blokes

Comment by andy@cynic

I was told only you were drinking alcohol during this flimsy excuse for an office party. Are you saying my daughters may see their Father in a less than favourable light the next morning?

Comment by Mary Bryant

its so tragic to see the bonds of trust in a once loving relationship become unravelled and replaced with deceit and mistrust.

will George abstain from alcohol? id like to say his family means more but we all remember what happened at cannes. you are better off without him mary. were all better off without him

ill send my lawyers details over and arrange a debrief on the companies affairs as youre going to be our new partner after youve stripped the lousy stinking fucker of every cent hes ever earnt in the settlement. fuck it. ill send one of the exes lawyers details over. they can suck assets better than monica lewinsky with a fucking turbo hoover

Comment by andy@cynic

Some people may not think eating crisps and drinking beer is brave, but taking on Mary is …

… it’s been nice knowing and working with you my soon-to-be-dead friend.

I guess I’d better get used to having 2 women on our board now – I’ll start by getting some gossip magazines and kitchen utensils in the place. 😉

Comment by Rob

i thought you loved your mum but with comments like that jill will cut your balls off and therell be no campbell grandchildren for your mum to play with in her backgarden

her loss is the worlds gain

Comment by andy@cynic

This is scandalous. Carry on.

Comment by John

Additional donations could be obtained by selling tickets to people who wish to watch the sorry spectacle/debacle unfold from the sidelines. Though I admit my sponsorship was conditional on not having to attend.

Comment by Lee Hill

They’ll have to bring their own candles because with the power out for 60 minutes, all they’ll end up experiencing is a lot of people groaning, burping and crunching.

And thanks for your donation Lee – I am sure the board will be over-the-moon to hear about it, ha!

Comment by Rob

if drinking beer and eating crisps saves the world, why the fuck do we have to have earth hour. surely the world would be in tip-top shape by now, given the habits of the australian male species. not to mention those of one andy boucher post-5pm.

Comment by lauren

Yes Lauren … but the difference is we’re earning money for doing it whereas every other fool does it for free. Free. Are they nuts???

And whilst I know we won’t save the World for our efforts [especially given all the cash is going to the homeless] we’re going to be able to do some good with it given we’ve somehow secured [so far] tens of thousands of sponsorship dollars!

Tens of thousands of dollars for basically cramming a years worth of men’s Saturday afternoon habits in 60 minutes … at this rate we could bail out the banks in 3 hours.

Comment by Rob

It’s just like the old days except this isn’t for the Rob, George and Andy charity. Love it.

Comment by Bazza

oh dear, girth hour? haha. i like the parody. i hope there will be pictures posted! that there is actually something good coming of earth hour is great! doing something for people while having fun.
and that whole global earth hour thing produces a little peak in awareness. that s pointless to some extent. there is no continuity and no real content. it s celebrating the problem as a global event and the issue will be forgotten about some days later. after the occasional rreporting in the media. i think it just gives people the delusional comfort of having done something. until next year. and they will feel free to forget and live happily ever after. well, until the lights go out. for good. i know my words sound populist and like i m having a bias. i do. the environmental condition is something that i am very worried about, amongst other things.
so i hope you are eating as much crisps as you can! cheers!

Comment by peggy

Good luck to everyone this weekend …

I’m in shock and awe at how much cash you have raised in sponsorships, your stomachs are worth their weight in gold. Well, maybe not gold but certainly something pretty valuable.

Have fun and keep a stomach pump handy.

Comment by Rob

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