The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Asian Yang [With A Message Especially Relevant To My Friend In Beijing]
April 2, 2008, 7:11 am
Filed under: Comment

April Fools

Just incase you didn’t get it [and I wouldn’t admit it if that’s the case] yesterday’s Asian Yang post was an April Fool.

Come on, surely calling the research company ‘Halibat Fisher’ was a big enough clue???

Mind you, there’s an advertising agency called GREY so anything is possible I suppose.

And if you think what we wrote on that blog was bollocks, you should hear what some of the ‘so called Asian experts’ spout – seriously, it’s fucking outrageous and scarily, they are being totally serious.

I remember meeting one of the self proclaimed ‘big hitters’ of Asian Planning – and after he had spent 20 minutes telling me every cliché known to man – I said that while I understood what he was saying, I couldn’t help but feel he was basing his whole analysis on Asia from the 70’s whereas from my perspective, I thought things were changing dramatically thanks to things like technology, education and foreign investment … a nd do you know what he said?

“How long have you lived in China?”


Sure living in a country will always give you a much greater ability to resonate with the pulse of the nation and the culture – however given this guy had spent his 20 years in Asia almost exclusively living/working and socialising with expats, he may as well of been based in fucking Manchester for all he knew about what was really going on.

Of course I couldn’t let his condescending and patronising retort pass so I replied …

“I’ve never lived in Iraq but I know many of the people there are probably feeling great oppression”

… which signalled the end of the conversation almost immediately, hahaha!

I’m sure Charles, Hari and Fred all have great examples of some expat ‘expert’ expressing their badly hidden prejudicial, blinkered and uninformed views – and whilst there are some fantastically insightful expats out here – there’s still a hell of a lot who manage to make a great living conning companies into treating the regions population like 3rd class citizens.

To be honest, the aim of Asian Yang was to see if we could get some of these corporate amoebas to quote the blog so we could then officially name and shame them – however given I’ve pulled back the curtain of my scheme just to get some cheap April Fool laugh, I guess I’ll have to find another way to wheedle them out.

Saying all that, there was one element of truth in yesterdays post …

This region is amazing – not just because it’s taking over the World, but because culturally it is so rich, with seemingly endless layers and influences – so I would wholeheartedly recommend anyone to come out here and work.

Without doubt it’ll be frustrating and confusing, but if you open your eyes, ears, heart and brain to all that’s around, it’ll also be one of the most exciting and interesting times of your [planning] life as well … and given much of the West is devolving interms of marketing and communication … you’ll get the chance to make a real difference to what is developed, which surely is one of the great goals we all strive for.

Or maybe that’s just me and my insatiable ego 😉

29 Comments so far
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i’m a fool.

Comment by lauren

youve got to give the expat fuckers some respect campbell, they knew about the asian hotties well before the rest of you pervert pricks were even a twinkle in your daddys ball sack.

still kudos to you for giving that asian planning big wig the metaphorical middle finger, what a cock and im just disappointed you didnt kick the fuckers head in.

Comment by andy@cynic

oh lauren tell me youre fucking joking. dont ruin the high impression i have of my tattood swearing art babe.

on the bright side you have all the traits needed to be a great planner, gulliblity is a highly desirable attribute, but only for creatives who want to alway get their own way 🙂

Comment by andy@cynic

and tell me this charles, fred, hari and campbell, why have you fucks survived in asia when so many of your fellow planners have left with their tail between their legs within 12 months?

thats a serious question by the way, i can ask them occasionally and its part 12pm so its not a fucking april fool though if it was it would still be better than the shit lauren fell for

Comment by andy@cynic

no, i’m not joking andy. i’m still a tattooed swearing art babe but am completely gullible about the deeper meanings of rice in china. lucky i’m not a planner… 🙂

Comment by lauren

But I am… so does that make me an uber-fool??



Comment by Age

It’s hard to answer that question seriously Andy now that you’ve mentioned the hotties, but I think it’s got something to do with the fact that I [and I think C, H and R would agree] genuinely love and am fascinated by Asian cultures and the fantastic challenges it offers from a communication point of view. I think that’s it really.

Comment by fredrik sarnblad

Fucker. I was in the shower this morning thinking it was a good idea for a blog but disagreed with that ‘lift’ shit. You cucking funt I love you.

Comment by Charles Frith

I think it’s because we’re actually all shit and put up with it because [1] clients don’t mind dealing with people they can manipulate to do whatever they want and [2] we couldn’t get a job anywhere else so have to make it work.

Well that’s what you keep telling me Andy!

Comment by Robert

Oh and Charles, the person who I slag off as the ‘Asian Plannng Guru’ I mention is someone VERY close to your home 😉

Comment by Robert

Yep. I know who you mean Rob. Although I’m on a gagging order.

i.e. I’m gagging to do a fucking post then an explosive link.

Comment by Charles Frith

God bless you Charles … I was talking to someone about you today, when we catch up, I need to hook you up with someone in Shanghai who’d like to at least “have a chat”.

And have you seen Jon’s great ‘socialistic advertising’ post?

Comment by Rob

Fuck me we’ve been going on about Socialist Media for ages haven’t we. Will mail you for Shanghai chats 🙂

Comment by Charles Frith

Bollocks – i fell completely for that – read it last night and actually only came onto the blog today to get the companies name so i could read more on their site. no wonder my friends used to call me ‘naive steve’
as bill hicks said, the creationists believe that dinosaur bones were put there by God to test our faiths..
GOD to Man – “Dinosaurs, you didn’t believe that did you – big fucking lizards walking around – are you stupid!!! I put them there to test you”
Man to God – “but, but it all seemed so plausible”

just what we need – God messing with our heads – a prankster god…! Ho, Ho I am killing me!!!

Sound familiar Rob?? don’t tell me I’ve got a God complex,..I am god.

Comment by Mr McG

I know you’ll say you are ‘trusting’ but ‘gullible’ is far more apt don’t you think?

Almost as successful as the April Fools where I told my company I had just learnt I was going to be a Dad and then received flowers from 6 offices around the World.

Well I say ‘successful’, but I wasn’t spoken to for months after that … story of my life!

Comment by Rob

And the award for best new comer in the category insights goes to…Halibat

“Wow…great ceremony, first Saatchi scoop all the creatives and now Halibat Fisher takes the insights…”

“A memorable night in Adland indeed…I think everybody who says adland lives in a bubble wil be humbled by this outpour of breaktrough thinking..we’ll be right back after a word from our sponsors…”

Comment by niko h

I thought it was real until I looked at the blog!

Comment by Rob Mortimer

Oi Niko, any news on you-know-what?

God this really was quite successful wasn’t it – I’m just trying to work out what it say’s about the people who read this rubbish, or the person who writes it, ha!

Comment by Rob


I think I cocked it up big time…I am assuming you are talking about the thing you wrote about?

If you are talking about the collective thing, it’s still in planning fase, but it’s def moving somewhere..

Comment by niko h

No, I’m talking about the thing I wrote about – don’t worry, what one person thinks is often not what others think so I am sure you’re OK.

Fingers crossed!

Comment by Rob

Do people now understand why so many clients are reticent to trust their advertising agency to develop ideas outside of traditional communication.

Comment by Lee Hill


what were you then talking about?? about the second thing? or about the HK thing? why is this turning into some dodgy London east end circa 1950’s conversation? ego is what keeps me grounded, so if it’s not to be I’ll just be briliant somewhere else

Comment by niko h

Why are most of your comments off?
Afraid to get slapped?

Comment by Seb

I’m talking about the HK thing Niko … are you? It’s all very confusing isn’t it, ha!

And Seb, the ‘comments off’ thing has nothing to do with getting slapped [you do it anyway] it’s more for either [1] personal commentary and/or [2] directing people to the blog I spent a bit of time writing so would like it focused on, haha!

Just got your VERY late email – will respond forthwith …

Comment by Rob

What part of this blog did you spend time writing?

Comment by John

When I’m on the loo – it’s the ultimate laxative, or maybe that’s for the people who read it.

Comment by Rob

Is that why everyone is so tense on here?

Comment by Rob Mortimer

No, it’s because I make their skin crawl.

Or is that John with Emah 🙂

Comment by Rob

Can we get back to the Asian hotties, it’s definitely the most interesting thing out of this whole post

Comment by Billy Whizz

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