The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Oh How The Mighty Have Fallen …
February 12, 2008, 6:41 am
Filed under: Comment

Look at this summation for a movie called ‘Pursued’ …

How bad is that eh?  A movie about a killer corporate recruiter … Hahaha!

I’m almost disappointed the last thing a headhunter did for me was send an old copy of the book ‘e’!

I have to be honest, the summation of this movie is one of the most ‘macho’ pieces of drivel I have ever read …




… it’s enough to make Jean Claude Van Damme wet his pants in excitement.

Of course I had to buy the DVD – I mean, it would be rude not to – and as much as it was one of the most horrendous pieces of shit I’ve ever subjected myself to [and this is a man who takes pride in loving absolute crap] it still wasn’t as bad as Jodie Fosters latest decent into the ‘Where Are They Now’ bin.

The thing that always amazes me is how many crap movies actually get funded.

Sure there’s always going to be some film-freak like me who’ll buy a copy of whatever crap they churn out – but most people aren’t as stupid as me, so I can’t imagine the investors would ever get their money back.

Hell, isn’t it something like only 1% of movies get a return on their cash? 

It has to be down to ego – infact I know it is – because as much as we convinced our accountant there was a valid business reason for cynic to launch potent_F L I X, the reality was we just liked the idea of creating some films.

Maybe it would of all worked out if Jade Goody hadn’t changed her mind about her interview in our doco ‘Focused On Fame’ [which looked into why people appeared on the TV show ‘Big Brother’] but the fact is she did so we basically threw an enormous amount of cash down the drain over a period of 2 years.

Do we regret it?

Sort of – but we regret the fact the film can never be released even more.

Is that because it’s was good?

Again, sort of – but it’s more to do with the fact our egos will never get the chance to be truly puffed up.

The movie industry has to be one of the ultimate examples of ’emotion overwhelming reason’ [so stick that in your pipe all you ‘people only react to rational argument’ planners] and I can’t help but think that if R&D departments had as many ‘experiments’ underwritten as the movie industry, then we’d live in a World free of illness, hunger and poverty whereas what we actually get is Christian Slater being able to eek out a living making z-grade schlock.

It’s a fucked up World and it’s all my fault, Ha!

13 Comments so far
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Nice to see you’re still the patriarch of bad movies. Infact I wouldn’t be suprised if Andy’s pitch to start Potent Flix was that they’d only focus on “Razzie” quality films 🙂
Unlike you I have no desire to see Christian Slater in anything and your point that the World might be a better place if all the C-grade movie funding was invested in R&D is a good one.
Maybe that’s the trick, instead of pitching NPD ideas as viable businesses, inventors/scientists should focus on investors ego’s and promise fame or infamy before profit or longevity.
Lets remember it’s not just bad Hollywood films that are being funded, someone thought the gold poo pill was a good idea 🙂

Comment by Pete

“it’s a fucked up world and it’s all my fault” – there’s a t-shirt for you.

Comment by lauren

Let’s do lunch.

Comment by John

i sense the cynic tshirt company is about to start. it might make some money for once.
and what the fuck are you on about pete, i didnt have to sell campbell on potentflix, the little shit is the biggest starfucker/wannabe on the planet and he saw it as his chance to finally make something of his life rather than constantly fall back on the shit records and tango ads he did before the world had electricity.
if you continue with that line of comment ill insist on you paying for dinner on sat. fuck it, i insist anyway, you get the pleasure of my company, what the fuck do i get?

Comment by andy@cynic

lets do lunch? as long as its not in your usual teenage girl restuarant youve got a deal.

Comment by andy@cynic

You are so generous Andy 🙂
I actually like the t-shirt idea, it’s not that big a leap from your greeting card company and that does exceptionally well. Maybe Lauren deserves a share in the company as it was her idea?

Comment by Pete

if that ever happens pete, i’ll buy you lunch.

Comment by lauren

thank you for giving away shares in my company pete, very fucking kind of you.
sorry lauren but you can whistle for any ownership rights but if you are lucky i might throw you a freebie shirt. got to be cruel to be successful 🙂

Comment by andy@cynic

glad you understand business so well lauren 🙂

Comment by andy@cynic

Andy: The Donald Trump of Business – and with a wife who is too good for him to boot 🙂

Comment by Rob

cock. and yes, that is a well constructed reply.

Comment by andy@cynic

Is this movie worse than Cuffs because that was fucking shit.

Comment by Billy Whizz

It is my dream to one day write a screenplay that turns into a feature movie.

And you can bet your ass it’s gonna have Christian Slater in it.

Comment by Age

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