The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]


Rob Has The Nerve To Ask For Even More Help …
August 9, 2007, 7:35 am
Filed under: Comment

Because there is the possibility that Angelina is going to break my heart [BITCH … not really my darling. Ahem] I need to do the World’s quickest – and crappest – research study.

[Lets call it a ‘dipstick test’ so our wonderful research guru, Terri, doesn’t crack the shits at me, ha!]   

Ignoring the individuals personal relationship status …

Women: Which of the women below do you hold in the highest regard as a person?

[ie: they have achieved success using their brain, not just their physical attributes]

Men: Which of the women below do you think is the sexiest?

[nb: not just in looks, but in who she is as a person. Don’t base it on these photos, think of the perception you have of them as a whole]

5723-Richards_Denise-11 Denise Richards

Cameron Diaz interview at Shrek 3 launch Cameron Diaz

Jessica alba at London premiere of Fantastic 4 looking fanstastic Jessica Alba

Jennifer Garner 08 Jennifer Garner

Lucy Lui Lucy Liu

kate_blanchett Cate Blanchett

Oprah Winfrey  loves Khalid Aljorni Ms Wannabe God [More Like Buddha]

I know you’re all going to be bastards and say Oprah just to piss me off … but if you could say who it really is, I’d appreciate it a hell of a lot.

[And ladies, whilst I grudgingly accept Oprah is a role-model for many women … I am looking for someone who you see has brains, values AND an element of attractiveness – and regardless of which way you look at it, not many women would ever aspire to look like Oprah, even when she’s in her ‘thin phase’, ha!]


49 Comments

rob, i may be completely clichéd with this, but cate (note the c, not the k) absolutely kicks arse over all those other gals. she is gracious, stylish, has an absolute passion for her craft, raises 2 kids, is married to an equally creative guy, and still appears to be completely down to earth when in the media spotlight (whether she really is or not, who knows), plus she’s an aussie gal and totally into supporting contemporary australian art, apparently.

Comment by lauren

You still like her even though she married a guy who can resemble a Spitting Image puppet? Ha.

I am with you regarding Cate [note I’ve changed the spelling just for you] … she is the ‘Thinking Man’s Babe’ which is a cunning ploy to try and associate me with ‘intelligence’ which anyone who reads this blog regulary knows is balls

Comment by Robert

Jessica Alba HANDS DOWN… pants.

Comment by Age

Cate Blanchett

Comment by marcus@ the ides of march

Cate Blanchett for me,

Comment by Mark

Denise Richards has always tripped my switches but she’s run into a close second by Ms. Garner. She makes me go funny in my head.

One person that I would have voted for if she were on the list is the beautiful Ms. Jessica Biel.

Comment by Stewart

whoever is the easier

Comment by andy@cynic

I’ll ignore the fact you spelt my fiancee’s surname wrong (her surname is Liu)…

In outrigt looks, probably Jessica Alba, but overall probably Cate Blanchett

Comment by Rob Mortimer

I concur with Jessica Biel. I’ve also asked a few of the chicks sitting around me in the office and they threw up Jennifer Connolly, who is respected as she’s very smart and incredibly sexy.

Comment by Age

Cate for me

Comment by Jade

1 = Cate (got a thing for womens noses )
2 = Jessica (got a thing latin women)
3= Jennifer (got a thing for women, period)

in fact, the look a likes of these women would still be the bees knees…

Comment by niko

1 = Cate (got a thing for womens noses )
2 = Jessica (got a thing latin women)
3= Jennifer (two is not really a choice…)

in fact, the look a likes of these women would still be the bees knees…

Comment by niko

Lucy Lui. Oooh, how controversial.

In terms of pure looks, Alba. Blanchett leaves me cold in every level.

Comment by Will

Are you saying I failed the audition?

Comment by Jade Goody

Three of these are renowned for not being exactly rocket scientists, you don’t want to flirt with Oprah so you’re down to three.

Comment by John Dodds

And one of those (JG) could well be teetotal.

Comment by John Dodds

But which one does it for you John!!!!

And Jade … you know how much I fucking hate you because not only did you stop our ‘FOCUSED ON FAME’ doco being released, but you basically ended up costing us a fortune because Potent Pixel now has no reason for existing.

I hate you – though slightly less than that other bitch who fucked us over with Guess.

NOW I AM ANGRY!

Comment by Rob

Don’t worry John, their drinking habits have fuck all to do with their relelvance to the potential idea.

Comment by Rob

Focus on fame?
Do tell…

(and please spell Lucy Liu’s name right next time!)

Comment by Rob Mortimer

Cate Blanchett. Definitely. Though I always would prefer Nina Persson.

Comment by Seb

You’re losing your mind again…

Comment by Rob Mortimer

We set up a film company [Potent Pix] whose goal was to create documentaries that would be distributed by Virgin whilst also being cultural studies for cynic and our clients.

The first one was called ‘FOCUSED ON FAME’ … where we interviewed contestents from BIG BROTHER [from alll around the World] to understand the reasons. motivations and expectations of why they wanted to appear on the show.

It was all linked to the cultural phenomenon that fame used to be a byproduct of doing something of note but now it is the end goal.

Anyway to cut a long story short, we were abit naive and the central character [Goody] didn’t sign an agreement till AFTER we’d filmed and by then her ‘success’ had started so she refused to do let us release it … leaving us with a film that couldn’t really be re-edited and a big budget that couldn’t be recouped.

There’s more, but just typing it again fucks me off. I HATE GOODY!

[I’ll re-spell Liu now!]

Comment by Rob

Hmm.
Now I dislike her even more (if thats possible, the ignorant, irritating, racist).

Comment by Rob Mortimer

Not as much as Andy does as she ruined his Spielberg aspirations, ha!

Comment by Rob

Cate obviously – different league.

Comment by John Dodds

She combines humour, intelligence, elegance and sensuality. And is a dab hand in the kitchen.

In the event, you will let her know that i got her the gig.

Comment by John Dodds

She will owe it ALL to you and I will INSIST on her showing you personal gratitude. OK?

Comment by Rob

yeah right.

Comment by John Dodds

Cate is the best in what you’re asking. Oprah most impressive for mind. Cameron Diaz a close second to Cate bizarrely for mind and looks/body. She’s the person I’d most like to hang out with at any rate.

Comment by Angus

Hello Angus … how the hell are you? If you can be bothered [and have the time] could you tell me why you’d like to hang out with Ms Diaz – please tell me it’s not for her burping ability!

Comment by Rob

And before anyone slags me off for not being in bed when I said I was so tired – the fucking jetlag has hit me again so now I’m wide awake even though I’ve only had 2 hours sleep last night.

And it’s only going to get fucking worse as I’m going into all sorts of timezones over the next 10 days. Yeah … I know … I shouldn’t complain, but it’s my blog so I’ll whinge if I want to, haha!

Comment by Rob

Nobody understands your pain Robert.

Comment by marcusbrown

If you weren’t going through such shit Marcus, I would say something mean like, “Well you wouldn’t as you get locked out your shed at 6pm every night” but I am a nice guy so wouldn’t do that.

Comment by Rob

5:15 actually.

Comment by marcusbrown

God bless German precision.

Comment by Rob

God bless German labour law.

Comment by marcusbrown

That nanoprecision gave us Kraftwerk and Oberheim, and for that I shall always be greatful.

Comment by Rob Mortimer

I am still not talking to anyone on this blog but for the record, Denise rocks and I like the fact she’ll put sex before friendship. Not that I’d get any from her because as you all fucking know I’ve not had a date for 2 fucking years.

Comment by Billy Whizz

Rob, even in being nice you can be a cock.

And why the hell doesn’t German fucking labour law doesn’t save me from working nights without getting a goddamn dime for it?

Comment by Seb

Sorry, but as a 26 year old hot blooded Australian bloke can I say – with much confidence that my views will be shared by most men I know – that Cate Blanchett is NOT “HOT/SEXY”. She’s smart, sensitive and really down to Earth, yes. But does she hold a candle to others on that list (and some that should be) on the hot scale? Not a chance. Rob, trust me… go with Jessica Alba.

Girls love her because she is stylish, and she’s not a slut. She’s respected because she is living the celebrity lifestyle and carrying herself proudly, all the while representing this aura of “Hollywood glamour meets the easy-going-down-to-earth-chick-from-’round-the-block” vibe. PLUS SHE IS SMOOOOOOKING HOT.

As for the Aussie guy’s point of view… Alba tops the sexiest people polls CONSISTANTLY. It’s really between her and Scarlett – whom I’m shocked didn’t make your list…

But anyways, something to think about. Goodnight all.

Comment by Age

get used to it seb, london will be worse.

Comment by lauren

age, what fucking planet do you live on? jessica alba is as from ‘around the block’ as j-lo is!

Comment by lauren

Two words, that will send all those women on your list back into the dark orbit known as “who the fuck are you again”:

NINA PERSSON.

Comment by Seb

jessica alba is a goody two shoes bore. sure when shes being made up by magazines she looks hot but otherwise shes got all the sex appeal of watercress soup. in fact the only reason id ever fuck her is to see if the up tight bitch can ever express any emotion at all.

Comment by andy@cynic

Seb – I’m worried by your obsession. I thought you’d been moved back to 200 yards now?

😉

Comment by Will

Yes Andy…the ONLY reason…

Hey, wouldnt doing Oprah be like doing you? Smart and sharp, with plenty of dough. *cough* and the rest.

😉

[In my defense, Ive never met you, so this comedic caricature of you is based on only what I have been told by others]

Comment by Rob Mortimer

there is no defense for that comment mortimer. if america can use wmd to fuck up countries, what hope do you think you have of getting out of a blatant attack. say your goodbyes.

Comment by andy@cynic

Its always fun to bring out angrandy. 😀

Comment by Rob Mortimer

I love waking up and seeing all the shit that’s been going on while I’ve been zonked out – it’s like the lunatics have taken over the asylum, ha!

Comment by Rob




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