The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

Every Cheese But One …

So Pizza Hut in Singapore have launched a pizza so cheesy, it could host a weeknight quiz show.

Not only do you get three kinds of cheese in the main part of the pizza [Cheddar, Mozzarella and Parmesan] but you also get cheese squeezed throughout the entire crust … a swiss cheese fondue dip and then some fucking fried cheese ‘chips’ to make sure your cholesterol levels can enter the Guinness Book Of Records.

Seriously, I wouldn’t be surprised if they announced all the bacon, sweetcorn, olives and onions had melted cheese in them as well … infact the only shocking thing is that Pizzahut is owned by Pepsico and not some anti-cholesterol drug company!

And here’s something even more mad …

In Asia, Pizzahut isn’t seen as the cheap, nasty and uber-unhealthy fast food chain as it is in the rest of the World … oh no … it’s seen as a fucking half decent pizza place to go to with your friends and family.

Plus … whereas in Oz you can get 2 large deep pan pizzas with a 1.5 litre of Coke and garlic bread for $18.99 [about 8 quid 50 pence] … out here the fuckers have the audacity to charge about SG$50 for the same thing. [about 17 quid!]

I have to say I sort-of admire Pizzahut Asia … in a World where most fast food companies are spending billions of dollars in changing their menus to healthier options and making an attempt to look nice-and-caring members of the community … this lot have simply said “FUCK IT” and launched the most stupid brand positioning EVER and gone all out to create the World’s first ‘edible heart-attack’.

Well done Pizzahut … you’ve taken a stand and gone against the grain which in Asia – thanks to the cultural value system – is rarer than Rocking Horse shit.

Oh and what’s seemingly the only cheese Pizzahut has missed out on including? 

[CLUE: You wouldn’t want it in your throat. Unless you’re a total sick fuck!]   

On second thoughts, I don’t think we want to go there …

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