The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

When Is Enough, Enough? [Part 2 of 3]

So previously I wrote about the gut wrenching pain you experience when you realise you’re not going to be the success you thought you were in an area where you truly believed you had a god-given talent.

Just like breaking up with your first true love … the feeling of despair is almost beyond description … and yet we somehow get through it, even though a tiny part of us gets left behind.

I know that when I realised my chances of being a Rock God were over, I literally went through a period of depression … especially as my inability to succeed was bolstered by the rather nasty legal situation I had put myself in with both the Music Union and the Publishing Rights Society.

However this post isn’t about that.  This post is about perspective.

You see I do not believe you should ever give up what you are passionate about … sure, you may have accept it won’t be the provider of your lifestyle, but it can still be a major part of your life.

When I was much younger, I used to be in a band that was being touted by certain individuals/publications as being on the cusp of ‘big things’. 

Maybe it was the innocence of youth … or the arrogance of rubbing shoulders with certain people/organisations … but I remember going to pubs and clubs and laughing at the bands whose members were 30 years plus.  To me, they looked desperate … hanging onto a dream that was never going to happen … a job for the young and hungry, not the old and tired.

Of course, my band – like millions of others – didn’t go on to Worldwide acclaim … fuck, it didn’t even go on to regional acclaim … and this ‘failure’ resulted in me walking away from writing and playing music – an art form I absolutely loved and lived for – because I was pissed off the fame and fortune I felt was going to be mine, wasn’t.

For years my guitars became decoration pieces … if I picked one up, it would be to play a few simple chords then put it back down again … and what made it worse was that because I wasn’t playing regularly [I used to practice about 5 hours a day and I did that for years] my standards fell – and then I started evaluating my ability on my current form and wondering what on earth gave me the belief to think I could ever of made it.

Of course every now and then I’d hear music I loved, and then I’d feel a pang to pick up a guitar and play along … and occasionally, I enjoyed it so much that it got me thinking about forming a band again, but the vision of those sad old bastards in pubs and clubs quickly put paid to that image and I got back to the other distractions of life.

However something then happened. 

Something good. 

Something scary good.

I was asked to help out on the music for an ad we were doing.

Suddenly I was back into the thrill of creation and expression … it wasn’t about fame and fortune… it was about doing something that took me to a different level, sent shivers up my spine, let me feel – and suddenly I realised those 30 year olds who played in clubs and bars when I was a young whippersnapper weren’t sad old bastards, they were just people doing something they loved without expectation, pretence or hope and that’s why if I could meet the bloke from the Apple Tango audition again, I’d tell him not to give up on his passion for acting, just give up on evaluating it against exaggerated success.

Doing something you are passionate about doesn’t mean you have to be successful at it – and yet we often forget that – so if there is something you truly love … something that makes you feel truly happy and fulfilled … then you owe it to yourself to keep doing it because otherwise you’ll be like everyone else … covering up unrealistic disappointments in life by acquiring even more pointless material possessions.

 Big Brother

Personally I think the media has to shoulder a lot of the blame for people losing their sense of perspective.

Lets face it, they’ve been shoving images of famous people down our throats for years with the subtext their life is some sort of utopia PLUS with the rise of [un]Reality TV, people know they can now become famous [infamous?] without having to actually do anything worthy of note – they just have to be willing to look a ‘lovable twat’ on national television.

I truly believe following what you are passionate about is as important as breathing, eating and sleeping … so as long as you keep perspective on ‘what you do’ versus ‘what you might possibly one day achieve’, then the answer to when is ‘enough, enough’ is simple: Never.

PART 3 is coming soon: REDEMPTION

[Yes this is like a RAMBO movie. Just not as fun or enjoyable, ha!]

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