The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

hang on, are we snogging, shagging or marrying the guy?
‘cos if i’m just snogging him, i don’t give a fuck about most of his emotional qualities. but if i’m marrying him, well, you know, something more than a cardboard cut-out of a man is preferable.

in nappies.

Andy … or should I say Mr Glitter … behave!

well, i think i have… shall we say, unconventional tastes, but i do like my men tall and lean. more likely to be punk rocker or math geek than school jock.

emotionally, i would love to have someone who possesses sensitivity to the world around him (not just toward people he loves, but toward things that are happening in the world – i guess i mean he must care strongly about SOMETHING), and also kindness and empathy. a trusting, open soul would be great. but not TOO ’emo’ – no insecurities, please, not sexy at ALL.

Charles wins best comment on this blog EVER.

p/s theletterzee = z, same person 🙂

Similarly. I the whole tall and lean, punk rocker/math geek, sensitivity/caring thing was starting to sound like me…but still…damn dome.

Bald men are dead sexy.

[Does that make you feel better NP?]

I agree with Lauren, there are different things I look for depending on the tenure I’m hoping to have with said man. But in general:

Physical – manly things like hair on the body or relatively solid thighs plus softer things like kissable lips or an affectionate way

Emotional – humour, intelligent, witty, can communicate, doesn’t bottle shit up and then lose it, lays things on the table, can calm women down when they’re being irrational

Thank you Angus for clarifying that … hahaha!

I’d like to say 2 things about this whole experiement I’ve found really interesting

[taking into account I’ve been doing other research with Cosmopolitan Magazine, street research, internet studies, groups and even 5 lovely ladies who happen to be professional strippers!]

1/ Women are very generalistic interms of the emotional qualities they look for in a man but VERY SPECIFIC in the physical.

I find this particulary interesting given women have always claimed they are about personality before looks, hahaha.

2/ In a previous agency we undertook this experiement where we hired a stunning French male model and a comedian [who sadly looked very much like me] to go out to bars in Miami and see who could get the most women’s numbers.

The model won about 1000:1 …

Lauren is dead right, women almost always categorize men as “good to snog/shag” or “good to marry” and the men in the two baskets have fundamentally different attributes.
Of course the attributes are not mutually exclusive, for instance the men in the “marry” basket need to have some of the basic attributes like intelligence and sexiness etc

But the one line description of the guy in the “Snog/Shag” basket would be- A guy who makes a woman feel sexy and lusted after; and for the guy in the “Marry” basket would be – a guy who makes a woman feel secure and loved. So added attributes like fidelity, honestly, stability and sensitivity etc pile on…. it’s a clear case of double standards.

But hey! it’s exactly like this for men too…men also have a different set of criteria when it comes to choosing a “potential long term partner”

PS- If we’re talking about specifics, the one attribute that all women find a BIG turn off is the habit of carrying on about some random “something else” ex-girlfriend …i mean, hello!what are WE supposed to be doing together exactly ?
The “marry” basket guy definitely and the “snog/shag” basket guy preferably (at least when he’s with you) has to see only YOU as THE woman in his life.
No , not pretend! he actually has to believe it…

Masculine means being practical?

Fuck.

oh, and i can categorically confirm that english men are way better dressed than their australian counterparts!

You know I want you Will. Firm clasping throttling motion 😉

I know I shouldn’t do this, but oh well.. here’s one from the Flickr Archives:

http://flickr.com/photos/lloyd-davis/560898311/

i don’t think i can speak for all women out there, but i guess there’s sort of like a screening system involved when it comes to assessing men – firstly, there MUST be physical attraction. and then, going closer, specific physical traits that you prefer (as Angus described) must be present (eg. solid thighs, nice smile, height, short hair, long fingers etc.). If the guy ‘passes’ that stage, then you continue to assess his emotional characteristics.

At least, that’s the way I do it. So yes Rob I don’t think there’s truth to the statement that personality should come before looks. We are all visual creatures!

There are people I know who hook up/get in a r/s with men they aren’t physically attracted to and claim it is personality… when actually they are just insecure about a man being goodlooking/more goodlooking than themselves.

That photo doesn’t capture the half of it!