The Musings Of An Opinionated Sod [Help Me Grow!]

STOP America Trying To Take Over Everything.
February 9, 2007, 9:51 am
Filed under: Comment

Yes brothers and sisters, we need to unite because our friend – the mighty sausage – is facing obliteration from that ‘thing’ known as American Bacon.

Yes … read it again … AMERICAN Bacon.

No, not Danish Bacon … nor English Bacon … but A M E R I C A N Bacon.

And you know what that means don’t you?

Yep … tasteless, fatty, plasticy rubbish – and their bacon is just as bad. [Boom Boom!]

First they kick out the Brits, next they flood the World with rubbish, then they invade the Middle East AND NOW THEY GO TRY AND CLAIM THE BACON!

We must put a stop to it or soon we’ll have AMERICAN Fish & Chips … AMERICAN Strawberries & Cream … AMERICAN Champagne …

In a matter of days the voting will commence and we need you … so please rise up, call out for your friends and as one unified group, get clicking!

We will fight them on the grills … we will fight them on the BBQ’s … we will fight them in the low-heat ovens … we will fight them in the Fast Food Shops … but we shall never, we shall NEVER EVER surrender.

A vote for SAUSAGE is a vote against wrongful invasion … a vote for SAUSAGE is for the sanctity of freedom, independence, humanity, innocence, peace and democracy. A vote for SAUSAGE is your duty.

[PS: Thanks for the piccie Billy – have you filled it in on your timesheet, ha!]

28 Comments so far
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Marcus did apologise so it’s the least I could do.

Comment by Billy Whizz

WOW … manners.

You are scared of the Argies aren’t you!

Comment by Rob

im back on monday. the sausage fight starts then.
k, make sure theres plenty of supplies.

Comment by andy@cynic

Every time someone in an American tv show or film has a cooked breakfast they always seem to have ham and egss.

That’s ham and eggs, not bacon.

I guess even they know it’s not worth wasting your time on.

Comment by Stan Lee

the way the yanks eat their breakfast is one of the most annoying things on the planet. youre right stan, its ham rather than bacon, but that still doesnt explain why their plates always contain ham, eggs, maple syrup and fucking pancakes. all together. on one plate.

they love their sweet and sour yet the daft bastards are petrified of the chinese. go figure.

Comment by andy@cynic

George W Bush told me to eat American bacon so I did.

I’m sad now.

Comment by Age

I’m moved. Really I am. I am moved.


Comment by Marcus Brown

Remember when George got kicked out of Starbucks for bollocking that woman for ordering a cappuccino with no-fat milk, no foam, no chocolate … even though she was chomping on some high fat, high sugar, high cholesterol chocolate bagel?

They’re the country of extremes.

Comment by Rob

Age … I am telling you to EAT SAUSAGE!

Comment by Rob

moved marcus?
bowels or emotions?

Comment by andy@cynic

Welcome back Andy!

Comment by Rob


Comment by Marcus Brown

That’s the crappest comment ever on this blog – and that is most definitely saying something.

Comment by Rob

is that a compliment?

Comment by Marcus Brown

have you changed your bloody skype setting again?

Comment by Marcus Brown

The only reason they add the word “American” to it is because its so bad that nobody would eat it without that element of patriotism…

Comment by Rob Mortimer

Yes it is a compliment … and no, I haven’t changed my SKYPE again. I don’t think so anyway.

Mind you, I am on another laptop so let me check.

Comment by Rob

I like Americans (Dubya excluded), but that won’t save their bacon. Not only am I forcing everyone I know to vote, I’m having sausage everyday until we win the vote.
BUT there’s stirring in the force, Andy’s coming. Who needs me?

Comment by Northern Planner

we you need . Together force stronger it is.

Comment by Marcus Brown

We need everyone we can get.

And as someone who was behind British Bacon, your support could be vital.

Comment by Rob Mortimer

We do need you NP … what if Andy is shot in Argentina? He’s still there and not due ‘home’ till Monday!

Comment by Rob

why would anyone want to shoot andy?

Comment by Northern Planner

Now look what youve done!

Comment by Rob Mortimer

Are you kidding?

… there’s 2 ex-wives and 2 ex-fiance’s for starters – then there’s the clients, the colleagues, the HR person …

And the bad news [for Andy] is because of his rather large ‘girth’, you can’t exactly miss him.

Got to go … my weekend is beckoning and please watch this space on Monday for a rather massive announcement!!!

Have a good one all … keep nattering/insulting.

Comment by Rob

Well said Rob … lets not make this an anti-Andy post, I do love him and we’ll need him on our side if he’s to help claim us the sausage crown.

Comment by Rob


Comment by Rob Mortimer

I meant why would anyone shoot andy when he’s so integral to the sausage thing of course. any american bacon big cheeses in argentina (now there’s a meal)

Comment by Northern Planner

Perhaps American Bacon is an extension of Freedom Fries?
‘Die for your Country: Contract Type 2 Diabetes Before You Turn 30. Eat American Bacon.’

Comment by lauren

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